


The Tie Pilot and the Resistance Officer

by SerStolas



Series: Stormpilot Week [4]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Stormpilot, Stormpilotweek, stormpilotweek2017
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-04
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-11-23 03:18:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11394270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SerStolas/pseuds/SerStolas
Summary: Resistance Intelligence Officer Finn Calrissian is on a mission to find information about the whereabouts of Luke Skywalker for General Organa.  When Finn is captured by the First Order, his only hope of escape comes in the form of Tie Pilot PO-7032IE what happens when you take the stormpilot role reversal prompt a little too literallyWritten for Stormpilot Week 2017, Day 4: July 4th - Soulmate AU OR Role ReversalAuthor's Note: Due to the nature of this being a role-reversal AU, this plot isn't going to follow the events of TFA perfectly. Certain situations and locations are going to play out a bit differently given Poe and Finn's roles.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
>  
> 
> Find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

Finn Calrissian, son of Rebellion General Lando Calrissian and Resistance Intelligence officer, quietly slipped off his land speeder just outside of Tuanul on Jakku. He would have preferred to either fly here himself in an unmarked vessel, or a direct drop, but General Leia Organa had declared it too risky, and since she was both his commanding officer and he was on a mission of personal import to her, Finn hadn't been about to argue.

BB-8 beeped at him as it slipped from the land speeder and rolled after Finn into the hut of Lor San Tekka. Leia had sent Finn here because Lor had specific information that they needed, a fragment of a map, necessary in order to find the General's hidden brother.

“We must be quick,” Lor San had told Finn. “The First Order has been trailing you for days.”

“I know,” Finn murmured as he handed the data stick that Lor had given him to BB-8. The little astromech quietly stored the stick away in an internal compartment. Finn was about to ask Lor another question when they both heard the sound of ships in the distance.

“They're here,” Lor San Tekka told Finn softly. He clapped Finn on the back. “Go, and quickly, whatever happens here, you must get that data to Organa.”

Finn slipped swiftly from the hut and made a break towards the dunes he'd hidden the land speeder behind. BB-8 rolled after him, quietly beeping as they reached the land speeder.

Finn could hear sound of forces converging on the village and dared to peak around the dune, his heart sinking at the sight of stormtroopers emerging from the ships. Somewhere in the night sky he saw black shapes move against the stars.

“BB, you have to get away from here, protect that data stick, get off planet and back to the Resistance,” he told BB-8.

~What of Friend-Finn?~ BB-8 beeped sadly.

“Don't worry about me, BB, I'll make it back, somehow,” Finn replied with a cockiness he didn't feel. But everyone expected that of him, and his humor and head and gotten him out of tight spots before. 

BB-8 beeped once more and then rolled quickly off into the sands.

Finn could hear voices interrogating Lor and the other villages and cursed silently as he pulled out his blaster. Then the first sound of blaster fire and Finn propelled himself out of the dark. He couldn't let Lor and these villagers die for his actions.

Then the mysterious Kylo Ren was there, quite literally stopping Finn's blaster bolt mid air. He remembered asking Ren who talked first, a snarky response to Ren's inquiry. He felt the restraining bolts on his wrists and his struggle as they forced him back onto Ren's ship.

 

~~

PO-7032 felt the same thrill he always did as the Tie Fighters were released from the Star Destroyer _Finalizer_. He was flying, and flying for the glory of the First Order.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, PO-7032 knew he hadn't always been a part of the First Order, but that was all he knew. He did not remember the parents that must have given birth to him, he did not remember any life before the cadets quarters, sometime when he was around eight or nine. Ant memories that classified him as an individual were stripped away, in favor of a blank slate that the First Order could model into the perfect solider, the perfect pilot. 

At twelve when all cadets were put through rigerious testing beyond the normal training for First Order soldiers, he had scored well in skills necessary for a pilot, and he'd been shunted to another base, another training program. Some soldiers went into the Stormtrooper program, others were sent to become pilots. Among those who proved themselves the elite in their tested professions, officers would eventually be chosen.

PO-7032 was a very good pilot, one who had never disobeyed an order, one who had given proven results time and time again on his assigned missions. He had only the First Order, he would not fail them. Every target he was given, he hit, every patrol assignment he followed. He would be better than every other pilot in the First Order, he would prove himself to be officer material.

He was stationed on the Star Destroyer _Finalizer_ the day his life took a turn he never expected to.

PO-7032 knew intellectually he was somewhere in his 30s, but he didn't know his exact age. He maintained a training regime to ensure he was in pristine physical and mental shape, so as to remain useful. 

Those Tie Pilots and Stormtroopers who were no longer useful were replaced. They were taken away and never seen again. PO-7032 suspected they were probably spaced, but he knew better than to ever ask any questions. He remembered PO-6304, a pilot the others had nicknamed Flames for her haircolor. She'd once asked where a fellow Tie-Pilot had gone. Then she'd been dragged away for reconditioning. She'd never answered to the nickname Flames again.

You asked questions, you got reconditioned. You became useless, you were disposed of. This was the reality of the First Order.

So when his squadron received orders to fire upon the village of Tuanul on Jakku, he didn't question the order as he and his gunner entered their Tie Fighter. He didn't question the order when they flew towards the planet, or when he guided the Fighter towards the village.

They were flying low, too low for PO-7032's comfort, but you didn't ignore a direct command. Somewhere in the dark, he could see the fires where the Stormtroopers had set buildings in the village on fire. Somewhere in the dark, PO-7032 swore he heard screams.

The reality though was he never heard anything but the sound of the Tie's guns and the breaking of his gunner.

With the village razed, the Ties flew back towards the _Finalizer_. PO-7032 had never fired a shot himself, he'd only piloted the Tie Fighter, but he felt a sick sensation in the pit of his stomach, a sensation he wasn't familiar with, as they landed inside the _Finalizer_ and disembarked, quickly lining up for inspection.

As he stood at attention, black helmet over his face and obscuring his features, Kylo Ren's personal ship landed and the Darksider strode out, flanked by Captain Phasma, and a prisoner being drug between two Stormtroopers.

From inside his helmet, PO-7032 caught a glimpse of the prisoner, a muscular, chocolate skinned man, bruised and bleeding from the treatment of the Stormtroopers he struggled between.

Then he was lead away, and PO-7032's squadron was ordered into debriefing.

Somewhere behind his helmet, PO-7032 felt a flash of relief that he would never be asked to take it off around officers. 

Since they'd flown over that village, something hung heavily on PO-7032's shoulders. Something screamed at him through the universe that all of this was wrong, that those people never should have died, and the prisoner shouldn't look the way he did.

But he's Resistance skum, PO-7032 thought. Shouldn't he be rejoicing that they'd captured a Resistance Spy?

He marched through the Star Destroyer with the rest of his squad, his mind swirling with these thoughts.

~~

Finn Calrissian strained against the straps holding him to the interrogation chair. 

“The Resistance will never be cowed by you!” he shouted at Kylo Ren. He'd already been beaten once, and felt the sharp probe of the interrogation droid, but he would give nothing up to these monsters. 

“The mind is weak,” Ren informed him, and then Finn felt a pull on his mind. Ren sifted through his thoughts, shredding through Finn's defenses like blasters through paper.

Finn remembered screaming as he strained against the restraints, and then slumped back as Ren withdrew, his mind and head aching, his soul screaming out against the intrusion.

He'd given up the Resistance...Ren had torn BB-8's location from him.

He'd failed the General.

That was his last thought before he passed out from pain.

~~

PO-7032 took another turn as members of his squadron continued towards debriefing.

He knew this was wrong, he felt it in his bones. He had to do something. He had to get away from here.

And there was one man on this entire Star Destroyer who might be able to help him.

PO-7032 took up a purposeful stride towards the interrogation unit. If he was right, the Stormtrooper on duty wouldn't argue too much, Tie Pilots were higher on the food chain than the troopers.

The door slid open, revealing an empty room but for the prisoner strapped to the table and a single Stormtrooper.

“Ren wants the prisoner, go and prepare the cell,” PO-7032 ordered the trooper. The white helmet nodded and marched from the room.

PO-7032 watched as the prisoner forced his eyes open, tired, pained brown eyes looking at his black flightsuit and helmet. PO-7032 pressed the button to release the restraints and took the man roughly by the arm, pulling his sidearm from its holster. He hustled the prisoner from the room and down the hall, then when he saw an opening, he took it and pulled the Resistance intelligence officer into a side room.

“Can you get us out of here, somewhere away from First Order space?” PO-7032 demanded.

“What? What is this? Are you with the Resistance” Finn demanded. Could this be one of their undercovers?

The Tie Pilot removed his helmet, revealing a swath of dark, curly hair and a handsome, tanned face, dark eyes regarding Finn. “This is a rescue. I can get you out of here if you can get us somewhere safe.”

“I'd need a pilot,” Finn hedged, trying to determine if the man was telling the truth.

“I am a pilot,” the Tie Pilot informed him.

“Then lets do this,” Finn replied.

The pilot nodded and slid his helmet back on, marching Finn through the halls of the Star Destroyer towards the hanger.

“Keep calm, keep calm,” PO-7032 murmured to himself.

“I am calm,” Finn told him.

“I'm talking to myself,” PO-7032 informed him.

Somehow they made it to the Tie Fighter, just before someone noticed them. 

“Can you shoot?” PO-7032 asked Finn.

“Blaster rifles,” Finn informed him as he buckled in. 

“Same principle,” PO-7032 informed him.

Somehow PO-7032 got the tether undone, and with all his skill as a pilot, he got them out of the hanger, even as other Tie Fighters were rallied to go after them.

He felt a momentary pang when Finn hit another Tie Fighter, but PO-7032 reminded himself how wrong he'd felt when they'd fired on the village.

“I'm Finn, Finn Calrissian,” the Resistance officer told him as they made their escape.

“I'm PO-7032,” PO-7032 informed him, dodging easily around another fighter.

“PO-what? That can't be your name,” Finn cried as he took another shot.

“It's the only one they ever gave me,” PO-7032 advised.

“Well I'm not calling you that. How about Poe?” Finn asked.

“Poe..yeah, yeah I like that!” PO...Poe, cried, feeling a thrill run through his body.

“Great. Now we've got to get back to Jakku, I need my droid,” Finn told him.

“Jakku, are you crazy? We need to get away, as far from the First Order as possible!” Poe replied in shock.

“No, I've got to find BB-8!” Finn said. “He's got coordinates, that could lead to Luke Skywalker!”

“Luke Skywalker, seriously?” Poe asked. Luke Skywalker, boogieman of Kylo Ren and the First Order...maybe that would be information to get. “Alright, I guess we should-”

Then there were too many Ties for Poe to dodge, and too many for Finn to hit, and their Tie Fighter was struck from behind.

“Kriff, we're going down Finn,” Poe informed him.

“Hang on Poe!” Finn yelled.

That was the last thing the newly named Poe, formerly PO-7032 remembered before they hit the sand, and blackness took him.

~~

Poe awoke alone in the sand, next to the burned out remains of a Tie Fighter. He scrambled to his feet, looking frantically for Finn Calrissian, but the Resistance officer was no where to be seen.

“Finn? Finn?”

Only the howling wind in the sands answered him.

Amid the wreckage, Poe found Finn's leather jacket. Poe stripped off the remains of his chest and back armor and dropped it in the sands. Holding Finn's jacket over one shoulder, he began to walk.


	2. Jakku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn wakes up alone and returns to the Resistance. Poe goes looking for civilization.
> 
> For Stormpilot Week 2017, Day 6: July 6th - Any AU (a continuation of my Role Reversal AU)
> 
> Author's Note: Due to the nature of this being a role-reversal AU, this plot isn't going to follow the events of TFA perfectly. Certain situations and locations are going to play out a bit differently given Poe and Finn's roles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> Find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

Finn had never in turns felt so elated and so depressed at once as he boarded the familiar transport, and aptly named _Pride’s Fall_. The, captain, a broad shouldered Mirialan woman named Kastin Prestor greeted him with a familiar, tight smile, her eyes scanning the small market that Finn’s rescuer had brought him to after he’d recovered enough to move on his own two feet again. 

When Finn awoke in the desert, no sign of either the Tie Fighter wreckage or Poe, he’d felt despair. His mission had failed. He’d lost BB-8 and could only hope the droid had avoided capture, and he’d lost Poe. 

He’d only known Poe for a matter of minutes, really, but he felt the absence of the man like the loss of a limb. The villager who’d found him advised him they found no sign of the wrecked fighter or any other people around, nor footprints indicating that there was anyone else who’d been in the area. There were creatures, they told him, which fed on scrap, which might have gotten to his friend before he’d woken up.

The dread in the pit of his stomach at that thought…

Kastin shut the cargo hold and moved to the cockpit, Finn following close behind and dropping into the copilot seat, a place he’d been more than once since Kastin used to run not so legal goods for his father.

“D’Qar?” she asked as she readied the ship for take off.

“Yeah,” Finn replied, his eyes staring out the cockpit at the endless shifting sands, hoping to the Force that Poe was still out there somewhere, safe.

Kastin didn’t say anything else until they were slipping through hyperspace, then brought out a flask of whiskey from somewhere and took a swig, offering the flask to him then. Feeling somewhat numb, Finn took it and took a sip, the amber liquid burning all the way down.

“So, you look like a man who lost his best friend,” she told him. “Much you can tell me?”

“Don’t think so, not yet,” Finn admitted, though he wanted desperately to tell someone about Poe, to share with them the story of the amazing Tie Pilot who’d saved him and defected from the First Order as a result. If Poe was dead, his memory deserved to live on.

“Maybe on base later then, after you’ve debriefed,” Kastin replied, taking the flask back from him. “You’re still alive though, Calrissian, that’s gotta count for something.”

“I wish it did,” Finn heaved a sigh. “I really wish it did.”

He was grateful when Kastin switched the topic back to more nominal things like supply runs she’d been making for the Resistance, and the last time she’d seen his father. Finn hadn’t seen Lando in three years, not since he’d defected from the Republic.

Finn had originally joined the Republic military at 18, naively thinking that the Republic still stood for everything his father had fought for with the Rebel Alliance. By the time he was 20, Finn had become extremely jaded towards the Republic. The protection forces did what they could, but the Senate resolutely ignored the threat of the First Order. So Finn had made a trip home under the pretense of personal leave, and then from Cloud City had defected to the Resistance, to join General Leia Organa’s forces, to join a group that was actually doing something.

Since Cloud City was technically still neutral in the whole Resistance vs First Order conflict, Finn’s contact with his family had limited, though Cloud City was at least sympathetic to the Resistance. 

Leia Organa was waited for him when the _Pride’s Fall_ hit the runway. Though he was tired and really needed a trip to the refresher and sleep, he followed the General into debriefing.

How Finn maintained his composure through debrief he would never figure out. He’d thought he’d break down when he got to the point about Kylo Ren invading his mind, but instead it felt like he was observing from somewhere inside his own body. The General ordered him to see Dr. Tembris the following day once he’d gotten some sleep to deal with that mental trauma.

He remembered the sorrow and guilt in her eyes when he spoke of Kylo Ren, but he didn’t know the cause behind it. He also remembered the astonishment when he told her about Poe.

“For your sake, Finn, I hope this Poe is still alive,” Leia told him, voice filled with sympathy. “I want to meet this Tie Pilot who broke a life of conditioning to do the right thing and free you.”

Finally, feeling completely exhausted, he was released to Dr. Kalonia, and then ordered to get a meal in and sleep. Woodenly he followed the orders, grabbing whatever was available this time of night from the mess, eating it without tasting it, and dragging his ass back to his bunk.

He lay awake in the dark long into the night, thinking about a pilot named Poe, a man who had never gotten the chance to live free.  
~~

Poe left the remains of his armor and even his flight suit in the sands, wearing just the undersuit he always wore under his flight suit and his boots, wanting to be rid of everything marked with the symbol of the First Order. 

After while he slipped Finn’s jacket on, inhaling the scent of leather and something that he thought must be specifically Finn. The first person who had ever looked at him as something other than a number, as an object, and he was dead somewhere in the endless sands of Jakku. He felt bereft and more alone than he ever had.

He’d walked kilometers and desperately needed water, he knew, but none of his survival training showed anyway to milk water from dry sands.

Finally he happened upon a settlement, and too thirsty to care, dropped beside a disgusting looking trough of water and drank deeply, wincing at the taste but needing hydration too badly. Finally he rolled onto his back, narrowly avoiding some odd livestock. 

He had to find a way off this planet. The First Order would have found the Tie Fighter by now, and would be searching for him.

At least, he supposed, if Finn was dead, he couldn’t be recaptured by the First Order and the horrors that would await him there.

He moved through the market, trying to figure out how he could get credits to get off planet (because he knew people didn’t haul passengers out of the good of their hearts) when he felt eyes on him.

Poe froze in place a moment and lifted his gaze to see a young woman, some years younger than he was, with dark brown eyes and brown hair pulled into three odd buns. Beside her was an odd looking round droid, beeping furiously as it came towards him. 

Kriff. Poe started backtracking to get –away- from these two. He did not need to draw any unnecessary attention! He tripped over a rug and ended up on his bottom, whirling around to find the girl with her staff in his face and the droid beeping menacingly at him. It stuck a prod out and shocked him as the girl shouted at him.

“Oh! What the-?”

“That jacket, you stole it!” the girl accused. “It belonged to his master!”

Poe realized suddenly this must be the droid Finn had been so frantic over. He sighed internally, and felt Finn’s absence again.

“Finn, Finn, Calrissian, it belonged to him right?” he asked both droid and girl.

The droid shocked him again.

“Kriff, stop that!” Poe yelped. “I’m sorry…Finn and I escaped from the First Order…he died in the crash.”

The droid paused, as if weighing Poe’s words, then beeped very sadly.

Poe felt like hell. “I’m sorry,” he told the droid. “I couldn’t find his body anywhere, just this jacket.” He frowned. “Hey, didn’t he tell you to make it back to the Resistance?”

“You’re with the Resistance?” the girl asked him, suddenly looking excited. 

“I-“ Poe glanced at the droid, silently begging the droid to back him up. “Yes, I am. Was, with Finn.”

The droid beeped and Poe got the impression if the droid had been human he’d be rolling his eyes.

“Can you tell-“ the girl’s words broke off when they both saw white figures at the end of the stall.

Poe cursed. “Its First Order, we have to get out of here!”

“What, why?” the girl asked as Poe nudged BB-8 with his foot. 

“Come on, Droid, we’ve got to get out of here!” Poe said, not listening to the question.

“BB-8,” the girl corrected him. “I’m Rey.”

BB-8 was already taking off after Poe, so Rey had no choice but to follow, particularly when the Stormtroopers seemed to notice them and started shooting. 

They both heard the sound of Tie Fighters in the air and Poe yelled towards Rey, pointing towards a hunk of junk parked in the sands. “That one, we need a ship. I can pilot.”

“So can I!” Rey yelled at him. “And not that one, it’s trash!”

Then a Tie Fighter took out the ship she’d been heading towards.

“Nevermind, trash will have to do!” Rey cried.

They just barely managed to get into the ship with BB-8 before the Stormtroopers caught up with them.

Rey was faster than Poe and managed to make it to the pilot’s seat before he did. He shoved himself into the co-pilot seat and they got the ship off the ground.

The next several minutes were some of the wildest of Poe’s life as he and Rey ended up flying through a Star Destroyer’s remains to get away from the Tie Fighters, Poe yelling advice at her since he knew the Tie’s vulnerabilities.

Only once they were in hyperspace did Poe feel he could breathe again. Then Rey was turning to him and asked. “So, you’re with the Resistance? Take us there?”

A pop somewhere in the ship startled both of them and they both started to scramble out of the cockpit to go see what it was but Rey shoved him towards the pilot’s chair. “I’ve got this, you and your droid buddy get us to the Resistance base.”

Poe glanced towards BB-8, who seemed to be considering him suspiciously. 

“Look, I know I’m not with the Resistance,” he hissed softly. “But please, can you plug in the coordinates? If nothing else…I need to tell them about Finn.”

BB-8 beeped softly. ~Why~

Thankfully Poe knew binary.

“To honor Finn’s memory,” he told BB-8.

BB-8 beeped curiously and then replied. ~Very well.~

The droid turned towards the flight computer to input the coordinates, just as they both felt the ship jerk, as it was pulled into a tractor beam.


	3. The Falcon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe and Rey encounter a legend, and Poe has some decisions to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr @nytemere

The First Order propaganda machine had a lot to say about General Leia Organa and her wayward spouse, General Han Solo. Both had been pivotal in the Rebellion's triumph over the Empire, and their names were regularly demonized among First Order officers, particularly General Organa's.

First Order propaganda, Poe was finding, was wrong about oh so many things. 

The attack on the village, Finn's rescue, and now this had Poe questioning everything he'd been taught, everything he'd dedicated himself to. If the First Order was wrong regarding the village and Finn, and now General Solo, what else were they wrong about?

At first helping Finn escape had been in part out of Poe's own need to escape, but then he'd realized it was the right thing to do. And if the right thing to do was to help a member of the Resistance, and now to help his droid get back to the Resistance...what might the Resistance hold for Poe? Poe wasn't stupid. As a former Tie Pilot and First Order defector (still unknown to Rey and Solo, though Poe thought Solo suspected something was up), he had a good deal of knowledge of the inner workings of the Order. That knowledge could be very valuable to the Resistance.

If Poe could prove him useful to the Resistance, they just might let him live. While the Order insisted that the Resistance tortured and executed First Order prisoners, that was not the impression he got from Han Solo when Solo spoke of the Resistance. And Rey seemed to view the Resistance with a vague sort of awe.

Their initial meeting with Solo had Poe questioning the wisdom of associating with the man, at first. His reputation as a two bit smuggler seemed confirmed by the fact that he was carrying dangerous cargo (who the kriff thought Rathtars were a good cargo option?), but he'd gotten Rey, Poe, and BB-8 out of there and kept the bounty hunters from trying to make off with their hides, so he owed the man for that at least. 

Solo advised them he they were going to Takodana first to meet with one of Solo's old friends to check the current situation before they tried to get BB-8 back to the Resistance. Rey had been for going straight to the Resistance base, but with bounty hunters on their tail, Poe had to agree with Solo that taking an assessment of the situation first might not be a bad idea.

Rey was reviewing repairs with Chewbacca on the flight through hyperspace, and Solo took the opportunity to corner Poe and BB-8.

"Alright kid, what's the real story?" Han Solo demanded in a low tone. Poe had no doubt he could take the man in hand to hand combat, but he found he didn't want to. For some strange reason he actually wanted Han Solo to like him.

BB-8 beeped. ~Tell him. Tell us. Of Finn.~

Poe heaved a sigh and launched into the story.

"I defected, from the First Order," Poe said slowly, watching Solo's expression very carefully. Solo regarded him impassively so he continued. "Finn Calrissian was captured and interrogated. I-I helped him escape, we stole a Tie Fighter and ended up crashing on Jakku." Poe wasn't entirely surprised to feel tears welling up in his eyes as he remembered waking up alone in the sand. "I couldn't find him anywhere. Just his jacket. He told me before we crashed that we had to find his droid and get it back to the Resistance."

BB-8 revealed a butane lighter, sticking it out, and giving Poe what looked like a thumbs up. Poe felt his shoulders drop as he relived that sinking feeling that Finn was dead and he'd never see the man again. They'd only know each other for minutes, but instinctively he'd known Finn Calrissian was a good man.

He was surprised by the sympathy in Solo's expression. "So now you're trying to help BB-8 get back to the Resistance?" Solo asked.

Poe nodded. It had occurred to him, right after he and Rey had escaped Jakku, that it might be better to try and just disappear, but something in Poe's heart wouldn't let him do that. When Poe threw himself into something, he threw himself into it wholeheartedly. He'd already defected from the First Order, why not go to the other side? The worst that would happen is they would kill him, but he sensed that they wouldn't, not when he had information that could help them,

And if he could keep one more village from being destroyed out of sheer cruelty, he would. This was how he could start.

"Yeah. I want to get BB-8 back. I want to tell them what happened to Finn," Poe said. "It just isn't right."

"It often isn't," Han told him with a heavy sigh. He clapped Poe on the shoulder. "We'll talk to Maz Kanata, then we'll see about getting you and BB-8 passage back to the Resistance."

Poe joined Solo, Chewbacca, and Rey on the approach to Takodana. As long as he lived, he would never forget the look on Rey's face when she told them she never knew so much green had existed. She'd lived her life in the deserts of Jakku, a barren and harsh world. Even Poe had seen greenery on Starkiller base, and other bases he'd been stationed on. Rey was many years younger than he, but she'd been shaped by a life as harsh and in some ways harsher than his own.

He followed the three into Maz's castle, BB-8 rolling quietly between Poe and Rey. The droid seemed particularly fond of the girl, and at least tolerant of Poe now that it knew he hadn't deliberately gotten Finn killed. Poe wondered how Finn would have reacted to Poe interacting with BB-8..

Maz Kanata turned out to be an ancient female of some race that Poe wasn't even aware of. She had a way of looking straight through you and assessing you. She seemed rather curious about Poe himself, and when Solo mentioned they needed to find passage for BB-8 and Poe, and possibly Rey, she seemed pleased.

"You feel fear and uncertainty, and yet you chose this path, though your fate may be unknown," she told Poe. "The time will come when everything will make sense, young man, and the next time we meet, you will wear very different colors."

He found himself staring at her pronouncement, and pondering exactly what it meant.

As he sat with Solo and Chewbacca at a table, eating something that while Solo looked at with mild annoyance, Poe felt was better than any ration he'd ever had in the Order, Rey vanished somewhere. She'd said she just needed a moment and that she'd find him again after awhile. After a few minutes, BB-8 followed her. Poe thought about following them himself, but then decided that perhaps Rey just needed time to adjust to everything. He certainly did.

The first sign that something was wrong was a rumbling sound outside, and Poe felt a shiver down his spine, as if something very dark had just entered the area. As the building began to shake, Maz came running up a flight of stairs, her eyes glaring towards the ceiling. "Those Monsters!"

"What is it, Maz?" Solo asked her.

She spat. "The First Order."

Solo and Chewbacca exchanged a look and then glanced towards Poe, and he felt himself grow cold, but Solo just gestured for him to follow as pieces of rubble began to fall from the ceiling. "Come on, we need to find the girl."

Poe jogged quickly outside with them, and was met with the sight of Tie Fighters firing down on the castle. A sudden rush of anger swam through him. His memories from the First Order told him that the Order was only doing this because they felt it necessary, that the Order did whatever was necessary to restore order from chaos. He was realizing now though that it was all a lie. The Order would simply stop at nothing to achieve their goals, no matter how many people were hurt or killed in the process.

And when the transports filled with Stormtroopers began to land, Poe whirled around, glancing for a blaster or something. "I need to find Rey, I need a weapon!"

And suddenly Maz was there, pressing a cylinder into his hand. "You have one," she told him.

Poe followed his instincts and found a switch on the side of the cylinder. Palming his hand over it, a blue blade of crackling energy hummed to life. He exchanged a glance with Maz and she nodded.

The Poe turned towards the oncoming Stormtroopers, determination written in his expression.

~~

While Finn was glad to be back with tbe Resistance, he worried constantly over the prospect of BB-8 being captured by the Order. Almost half of his psychotherapy session had been about his guilt over losing BB-8 and Poe. They'd barely touched on what Kylo Ren had done, and honestly Finn wasn't sure he was ready for that.

Poe should have made it back with him. Poe never got the chance to live free. Finn felt his absence keenly.

"Go rest for a bit," he was advised, and good advise at that since he hadn't really been sleeping.

 

He was halfway to his quarters when Connix came jogging down the hall, her face flush with excitement.

"Finn!" She cried. "General is ordering you to gear up. BB-8 has been spotted on Takodana!"

A thrill ran through Finn, and he hurried after Connix.

At least part of his mission might be successful yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I know this far different from the movie. Poe is making his decisions from the perspective of someone almost a decade older and from a far different position within the First Order than young Finn's sanitation officer Stormtrooper. I can't blame Finn in the least for wanting to run in the movie.


	4. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That moment everyone's been waiting for - Poe and Finn reunite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr @nytemere

Poe didn't know the Stormtroopers personally, he'd never really been socialized with them in the Order because he was pilot, not a ground troop. He could guess though that their orders were to destroy everything at the way the Stormtroopers were pushing through the rubble of Maz's once great palace. Enough strikes from Tie Fighters had leveled a building that Poe was willing to bet had stood for hundreds of years.

It was just another reminder of the First Order's need to destroy everything that didn't fit into its plan. He didn't know if any of the Stormtroopers recognized him, doubtful since he'd been a Tie Pilot, but they looked upon him with no love as they shot at him. The first time he brought the strange weapon Maz had given him up, he felt a shock as it blocked the bolt.

Lightsaber, his mind supplied, like the one Kylo Ren carried, only this one felt like it had a different sort of history to it.

At least one of the Stormtroopers was tearing through victims they found among the wreckage with what Poe recognized as a riot control baton. While Poe doubted anyone here was really an innocent, striking down a wounded man did not sit right with him, and he found himself rushing towards the Stormtrooper with the lightsaber. 

He found rumors among the pilots of Stormtroopers being more rigorously trained for ground combat was not an exaggeration, and within a few minutes the Stormtrooper was pushing him backwards. Poe barely avoided tripping over rubble as he caught one strike on the lightsaber then dodged another. He could feel the energy flickering off the baton and knew it wasn't set to stun. This faceless Stormtrooper had every intention of killing Poe here and now.

And he found he was most certainly not ready to die. 

He could feel his strength flagging though, until a shot whizzed past his ear and he heard Chewbacca's call behind him. Within moments he found himself reunited with Chewbacca and Han Solo, shooting their way through the ruins as Poe worried where Rey and BB-8 were. 

There were too many for the three of them though, and Poe found himself with his hands up behind his head, cornered with Solo and Chewy, an angry glint in his eyes as he glared at the Stormtroopers. More and more he realized what the Order did wasn't right.

Then a shot came screaming from the sky, but not from a Tie Fighter...

"It's the Resistance!" Solo cried as an X-Wing mowed the Stormtroopers down. As Poe suddenly found himself no longer cornered, he grabbed the lightsaber and a blaster and went shooting into the frey once again. More fighters roared through the air, and for a moment Poe wondered what it would be like to be in the cockpit of one of those Resistance X-Wings. Would it be more thrilling than how he felt in a Tie Fighter? 

More Resistance ships appeared, including small transports carrying ground troops, landing in areas cleared by the X-Wings as the X-wings took on the remaining Tie Fighters. The X-wings looked so kriffing good in the air, and Poe felt a strong desire to fly one yet again. But he needed to find Rey and BB-8 first, or else all his words about returning BB-8 to the Resistance were for not. He charged through the rubble, catching sight of something, feeling a cold chill down his spine, as he realized it was Kylo Ren, heading for a First Order transport. And was that..

No, not Rey! Poe leaped over a fallen wall, yelling himself almost hoarse as he chased after Kylo Ren, but he wasn't fast enough. "No..REY, REEEEEY!"

Then the ship was lifting off and it was gone. Rey was gone, and in the hands of that monster. No, this wasn't right, they had to rescue her, they had to get her away from that monster. 

He heard the sorrowful beepings of Binary as BB-8 came rolling out of the forest surrounding them, telling Poe that Rey had tried to protect him, and had told him to hide, and Kylo Ren had taken her instead.

"Come on, BB-8," Poe told him. "We have to find the Resistance leaders, you need to get back to them, and they have to help us get Rey back!"

~Agreed~ BB-8 beeped an affirmative and went rolling quickly along with Poe as Poe jogged back the way he'd come, in the direction of the Resistance transports to find one of their officers.

As they approached, BB-8 started beeping rapidly.

~Friend-Finn, Friend-Finn! Friend-Finn is alive, Jacket Thief Poe!~

Poe froze a moment as the droid charged on ahead. It was Finn! 

Poe chased after BB-8, his heart beating a rapid tattoo of relief, and something else Poe couldn't put words to.

~~

Finn fairly trembled with anticipation as he rode the transport towards Takodana. They would find BB-8, they would get the information, his mission would be a success, it had to be. As they neared the planet, they got radio from the X-Wing pilots that there were First Order troops on the ground. Finn gripped his blaster rifle, aware of the weight of his side arm at one hip. They would succeed, they had to.

"We've got this," Indre, one of the Pathfinders he was riding with, told him. Their lips curled back into a fercious smile. "We'll get them coming and going, I promise you, Lieutenant."

"Thanks, Lieutenant," Finn found himself grinning in response/

The transport landed in the middle of the chaos in a space the X-Wings had cleared and as the back of the ship dropped open and he and the Pathfinders, as well as another Intelligence officer pounded out, opening fire on the white figures in Stormtrooper armor, sweeping up the stranglers that the X-Wing pilots hadn't blasted down. Finn felt the thrill of battle shoot through his blood and his lips tugged into another grin. They were doing this.

After several minutes of fighting, he caught sight of a First Order transport vanishing into hyperspace from the corner of his eye, and others began to retreat. He moved with the Pathfinders to shoot or capture those they could, moving through the rubble and ruin of Maz Katana's castle. A platoon of stormtroopers formed up around the entrance to one of the last First Order transports on the ground, shooting at, for lack of a better term, anything that moved. Finn's jaw clenched as he saw figures moving through the rubble, associates of Maz by their clothing, one of them in a brown leather jacket, jogging down from the tree line. As the line of troopers raised their blasters to fire at the unsuspecting figure, Finn began taking them out in rapid succession with his blaster rifle. He saw Indre raise their rifle as well, taking out those Finn couldn't get. Between the two of them the platoon was down within moments. 

He was aware of the General's ship landing, and...was that Han Solo and Chewbacca? Finn had known them his entire life, seeing as Han and Chewie were very good friends of Lando Calrissian's. He started to approach to greet Chewie when a bright orange and white ball came whirling out of the ruins, beeping so fast Finn almost couldn't understand it.

"BB-8!" He cried, absolute joy filling him as he leaned down to put his hand on the droid's domed head. "BB, buddy, you're safe!"

"Finn, Finn Calrissian?"

A voice that Finn had never hoped to hear again spoke his name and his head jerked up, eyes going wide and tears almost forming in the corners of his eyes as he saw Poe charging towards him. He stood and opened his arms, catching the older man in a fight hug. 

"Poe! Buddy, I thought you were dead!" Finn cried again, his heart beating perhaps a shade too fast. Poe looked so damn good, and Finn almost wanted to lean down and kiss the other man.

"I thought you were," Poe replied, relief evident in his voice as he gripped Finn in a tight embrace Everything felt right in the world now, with Poe in Finn's arms. "I couldn't find you in the wreck!"

"I woke up to no wreck, no you, in the middle of the desert," Finn explained, his hands still on Poe's shoulders. He never wanted to let this man go again. He glanced at BB-8. "Do you know what this means? You completed my mission, you did it, Poe! You got BB-8 back to the Resistance. You're a hero." He paused as he recognized the familiar leather beneath his hands. "Is that my jacket?"

"Oh!" Poe exclaimed and started to slip it off.

"No..no, keep it, it suits you," Finn told him, a broad grin crossing his lips.

Poe's answering grin was all the reward he needed. 

BB-8 beeped at their feet and Poe's expression feel. He looked up at Finn. "Finn, I need your help. The Kylo Ren took my friend. She helped me on Jakku. We have to get her back." 

Finn's heart stuttered a moment, but Poe had said friend, not girlfriend...why was Finn even thinking about that at a time like this. Poe needed his help and he would gladly give it, and anything else Poe needed. Finn glanced towards where General Leia Organa and General Han Solo were talking, evidently oblivious to everyone around them. He took Poe's hand in his and pulled him towards them. "Come on, lets go talk to the General. We'll need to regroup at base, but I promise you, we will get your friend back. You're a good man, Poe."

More relief flickered over Poe's face and he didn't pull his hand away from Finn's, though he managed to smirk a little. "I was going to say the same thing about you, Finn Calrissian. Lets go rescue Rey."


	5. D'Qar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance regroups and plans an attack on Starkiller.
> 
> Author's Note: Yes I am aware things are a bit out of order plot wise from the movie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts

The expressions on the faces of Resistance personnel when the door to the Falcon opened told Finn how tense the situation still was as the Falcon's door came open and he slowly walked down the plank. He glanced towards the landing transports and X-Wings, recalling the destruction of Hosnian Prime and what it had cost the Republic. The First Order had struck a terrible blow.

Poe followed close at Finn's heels, eying the Resistance soldiers with some wariness and Finn could almost feel the tension bleeding off of Poe. He frowned slightly, giving his friend a sympathetic look. "I know you won't be alright until we get Rey back, but what else is wrong? They're going to help us."

Poe's gaze went to the line of X-Wings on the runway and he spoke in a low, taunt voice. "Are you sure, Finn?" Poe asked. "I was a First Order pilot, for years, Finn. It wasn't as if I was a solider on his first mission when I defected. How much are they really going to trust me?"

Finn blinked, the question blindsiding him. Honestly, he hadn't thought much about it. Poe had bucked everything he had ever known to rescue Finn and help him escape the First Order. General Leia Organa herself wanted to meet Poe, why wouldn't they trust Poe? 

But then he saw the curious looks from some of the pilots and the soldiers. The way Poe was dressed, they probably assumed he was with Solo, but how many people wondered where he'd come from, why he was here? Finn had no doubt they would rescue Rey, he refused to believe anything else, but what happened after that? With the need to rescue Rey, it wasn't something they had much time to dwell on right now, but Finn wanted to find a way to reassure Poe, however he could.

"Lets talk to the General," he told Poe, leading his friend through the throng of people and towards the command center.

"What's everyone worried about?" Poe frowned as they walked.

Finn shot him a weary look, one not suited to his 23 years. "Hosnian Prime. The First Order destroyed it."

The General was already in the command center, screens lit up around the room and Finn could hear people talking about Hosnian Prime and the superweapon that had destroyed it. Then Finn felt Poe freeze in place beside him. When he glanced towards Poe, the other man's eyes were wide, his expression like someone who'd just had an epiphany. He glanced at Finn and said in a very low voice. "Starkiller."

Finn grabbed Poe by the hand and pulled him through the room until they reached the General.

"General Organa, this is Poe, he needs to talk to you," Finn announced. Poe shifted his stance as he now stood before Leia, a soldier at parade rest, looking like a man who desperately wanted help to free his friend, and also like a man meeting his doom.

Leia's smiled disarmed Poe. That was the last expression he had expected. If she'd been a First Order officer she'd already have struck at him. "Poe, I'm so glad you meet you. That was a very brave thing you did, freeing Finn and defecting."

"I only did what was right," Poe found himself answering a bit stiffly, but Leia didn't seem to take offense. Instead she nodded with an odd sort of understanding. "But I need your help. The First Order took my friend, Rey. Kylo Ren took her."

"Then we need to free her," Leia replied determinedly. 

"There's more," Poe said, glancing towards monitors around the room. "That weapon? It's called Starkiller. I, I didn't know what they really intended to do with it, but now." He swallowed. "That's got to be where they've taken Rey. Starkiller base."

"Can you help us find a weakness?" Leia asked sharply.

Poe swore everyone in the room stopped and focused on him. In the First Order, this much focus on you was never a good thing. You kept your head down, followed your orders, and hoped you survived. He reminded himself he was doing what was right and that he would see whatever this was through to the end...he had too much valuable information for the Resistance to kill him, but they might imprison him, after all of this was over.

Saving Rey was worth it. As long as he knew Rey and Finn were safe, it was all worth it, whatever happened.

"Do you happen to have a copy of the plans?" he asked.

Leia gave him an odd smile and lead him to the center console, everyone around them staring. Across the console from them, a big man with dark eyes, beard, and hair, dressed in the orange flightsuit of a Resistance pilot, stared Poe down. 

"These plans are based on Snap's recognizance mission," Leia said, pulling up a glowing diagram of Starkiller base. 

Poe took a deep breath and pointed to a spot near the center of the plans. "The base uses the power of a star, completely draining it, to power its superweapon. The Order has some fairly hidious grand designs about bringing 'order' to the galaxy. After Jakku...well all they want to bring about is terror." He stared up at the diagram. "There, it's a reactor. If you can get someone inside and cause an internal explosion there, then it'll start a chain reaction through the whole base. It will give your pilots a better target." He chewed the inside of his lip, thinking he'd want a shot at it himself, but they'd never trust him in the cockpit of an X-Wing. "It would be a shot I'd take anyway," he heard himself say.

Across the console, Snap's eyes narrowed as he regarded Poe. "You were a pilot?"

"Unfortunately," Poe responded. "It's...it's a different place. They do things to you."

Finn shot a look that wasn't quite a glare at Snap across the console. "He broke conditioning, Snap, to save me."

Snap's eyes narrowed, then, strangely, the pilot turned to General Organa.

Leia gazed at Poe, and he felt as if her eyes bore into him, reading every intention he ever had. Then she smiled again, and he saw Snap go slightly less rigid out of the corner of his eye. 

"He defected, Snap," General Organa informed the X-Wing pilot. "And he is sincere."

"You'll forgive me if I'm still wary," Snap said, directing his words at Poe. 

"I would be too, in your position," Poe admitted. He shook his head. "But we have to free Rey...we have to get her away from that Monster."

Snap regarded Poe with a wary sort of respect. "We'll save your friend," the pilot promised. "What happens after that I don't know, but we'll save your friend, and destroy this atrocity."

Poe felt the same wary respect for Snap. "Thank you."

General Organa considered Poe with thoughtful, narrowed eyes. "Poe, I know you're a pilot, but you know Rey, as does Han, the rest of us don't. I want you with Han and Chewie on the ground team."

"I'm going with them," Finn told her.

Leia lifted a brow at her Intelligence officer. "It has to be a small strike force," she said. "But one more member could help, and Han knows you. He got you into enough trouble when you were a child." Her tone was amused. "Be careful Finn. And you two, Poe. Come back alive, both of you."

There were several tense moments after that, and Poe guessed that news of who, or perhaps what, he was began to spread through the base because as he prepped by the Falcon, he saw more than a few people looking at him. Some of the expressions were curious, some were wary, and some were outwardly hostile. He knew why, he expected it, for all that he wanted to yell at some of those hateful looks that he hadn't had a choice in any of this, that all he'd ever known was the First Order and that they'd programed him since childhood to be loyal to no one but them, and that it took witnessing the actual slaughter of innocents, outside of the cold white and black corridors of the Order for him to realize how real all of this was, and how wrong it was.

But he didn't yell, because PO-7032...Because Poe, once he put his mind to it, didn't back down. He had chosen to defect from the First Order. He had chosen to help break Finn out, and then he had chosen to get BB-8 back to the Resistance when he'd encountered the droid.

There was no going back now.

~~

Within the hour, Poe found himself back on the Millennium Falcon with Han Solo, Chewbacca, and Finn, armed with a blaster pistol and standing behind Han, watching as the old smugger prepared the ship for flight. Finn stood beside him, reassuring hand on Poe's shoulder.

Poe's nerves were swirling, though he hid it well, he'd learned to hide that kind of thing in the First Order a long time ago. Hopefully they'd sneak into Starkiller base and Han and Chewbacca would plant the charges while Poe and Finn searched for Rey. Once they got her out and the charges were set on timers, they'd retreat to the Falcon and take off, escaping the planet before, or perhaps as, the chain reaction was blowing through, giving the X-Wing pilots a chance to get their shots in and destroy the planet before it was able to completely charge using the sun in the system they'd settled on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poe comes a very different situation within the First Order than Finn did. He's got about a decade of active experience as a Tie Pilot; ten years where he's flown multiple missions and hit who knows what targets. As a result of his age and experience, vs Finn's experience of being on his first real mission in the movie, Poe's reception in the Resistance is quite a bit different. I wanted him to specifically encounter at least one of the X-Wing pilots to see how one of them reacted, and to also show, in this world where Poe never defected from the Republic, who else stepped into that role, and how much faith they put in Leia and her abilities.


	6. Starkiller - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe, Finn, Han, and Chewbacca head on a mission to Starkiller

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

As the Millennium Falcon settled onto the snowy surface of Starkiller, Poe felt a sense of unease settle over him. He glanced towards Finn as the Resistance officer tested the draw on his blasters. There was a sense of pureness about Finn, for all that the man acted as a spy and Force knew what else for the Resistance, a goodness to his heart that Poe wasn't entirely certain he could ever duplicate. He had chosen to defect because he could no longer stand the thought of killing innocents, but he still had almost ten years of service in the First Order. Even though he was beginning to realize how thoroughly indoctrinated he'd been since childhood, it still sent guilt spiking through him. Was he really a good man, as Finn declared?

“We'll get this done,” Finn promised him, “We'll get Rey free, and we'll help the pilots blow this place out of the sky.”

“Right, help the pilots,” Poe murmured, thinking about when he'd been in a cockpit on the opposite side of the Resistance. He remembered Snap's distrust.

“Lets do this,” Poe said with a confidence he didn't quite feel, but bravado would hopefully see him through this. They had to see that Rey was free.

Poe and Finn lead the way off the Falcon with Han and Chewie close behind, Poe's fingers gripping his rifle and knuckles going white between cold and being far too keyed up. His gaze swept the planet surface as he tried to remember what little he'd been shown of the exits of the base as a pilot, and lead the group towards a door he knew would lead them to the interior.

“You sure you know where you're going, Kid?” Solo asked as Poe pressed his fingers against the keypad.

Poe muttered under his breath as the codes he knew didn't work. They might be older, Tie Pilots rarely had reason to go to Starkiller's surface..”They may have changed the codes,” he explained. “We're going to need someone from the inside.” His brown eyes narrowed thoughtfully and he looked up, catching Finn's gaze as he did.

“Phasma,” they murmured together.

Finn regarded the panel and lifted a blaster, then took a well placed shot. The panel crackled with energy as the door slid open and Han chuckled. “You know you could have hacked the code. I'm certain your father taught you how.”

“Could have, but it might have also wasted time,” Finn shrugged. “Efficient is more important than appearance right now.”

“It's always been more important,” Solo snorted then moved down the cooridor, accepting a grenade from Chewie as the Wookie followed him. Finn and Poe followed, Poe's fingers twitching as he thought about the fact that he was attacking a First Order base within less than a week of defecting. This was either genius or suicide, but he had to do it. His mind chanted Rey's name, a firm reminder of why he was here, as he and Finn came charging into an interior hall and started blasting at Stormtroopers. The glint and enthusiasm with which Finn seemed to approach everything in his life was infectious, and Poe found it worming its way through his cynicism.

They made a fast clip through the corridors, watching lower levels from various vantage points before he and Finn recognized the glint of Phasma's chrome armor. They gestured for Solo and Chewbacca to follow them and slipped through the halls, Finn executed what Poe could tell was a very practiced move and took Phasma hostage, holding a blaster to her chromed head without an ounce of hesitation.

“You're going to help us,” Finn informed her as Poe took up the position in front of her, holding his blaster rifle aimed towards her while Solo and Chewbacca guarded their tail.

“You're going to lower the shields,” Poe told her with little inflection in his voice. He felt a twinge of fear, but more a rush of adrenaline at holding that rifle towards her, a sense of freedom, that he chose to do this, rather than following this chrome woman's orders.

“PO-7032. You are making a mistake,” Phasma said in a monotone voice.

“It's Poe,” the former Tie Pilot replied, feeling a smirk quirking his lips.

They forced her through the halls, using subversion where they could to avoid drawing additional attention, and straight out killing when it became necessary, sneaking up on Stormtroopers and executing or knocking them out. Chewbacca evidently had an array of different grenades and tossed more than one into a hall or room to clear it out and clear their way.

“You will regret this, PO-7032,” Phasma repeated as Finn and Poe together forced her into the control room.

Poe aimed his blaster rifle at her chest. “Lower the shield, Phasma. Now, or I will shoot.”

Phasma seemed to realize he wasn't bluffing and did as ordered.

Finn grinned at Poe.

Behind them Solo spoke, “So now what do we do with her.”

Poe regarded the woman critically, recalling her cold demeanor over the years, and the rumors of her unquestioning obedience to Kylo Ren.

“Garbage chute,” Poe replied.

Solo and Finn both gave smirks of agreement. Poe heard Chewbacca say something about how fitting it was, given the last time that Solo was on an installation like Starkiller. Poe made a mental note to ask Solo about that one later, if he was aloud.

The sound of Phasma's armor clunking down a garbage chute had a certain finality to it. Poe took a deep breath. “Now we need to find Rey.”

"Looks like she found us," Solo's voice cut in. Poe's head jerked up and his eyes followed Solo's hand.

Rey was climbing up one of the interior walls, from one level to another, a blaster slung across her back. Poe shook his head in mild amazement. "How'd she manage that?"

"You already said she was a great pilot," Finn mentioned as they watched Rey scale the wall. He followed Poe as the older man ran to the end of the hall, waving through a window at Rey and calling her name. Her head jerked up, and there was some relief in her expression as she shifted and climbed towards them.

Poe and Finn both reached out a hand, pulling her up when she reached them.

"You're here," Rey said in mild wonder as she hugged Poe.

"Of course I am," Poe replied, hugging Rey tightly, glad that his friend was safe. "We came to get you out. But I guess you managed that part on your own."

"Just out of the cell," she replied. "Didn't know how I'd get off this thing."

"I think we can help with that," Finn told her with a grin. He offered a hand, and Rey eyed his hand a moment before shaking it. "I'm Finn."

"You're the one who helped Poe?" she asked. Her posture unbent just a margin, but Finn couldn't entirely blame her. If she'd been taken and tortured by Kylo Ren, that was enough to put anyone on edge.

"I think it was the other way around," Finn replied with some mirth.

"If you three are done chatting, we need to get out of here," Solo reminded them.

Solo and Chewbacca lead the way out of the base, towards the snowy surface and the waiting Falcon. Poe felt both anticipation and dread. Now that Rey was free, they would head back to the Resistance base. And after that? He fully expected the Resistance would throw him in a cell. He reminded himself it would be better than reconditioning, but he wasn't entirely sure if he believed that.

He tried to take some comfort in the looks Finn shot him, a hint of worry on Finn's brow when he saw Poe's frown. Over and over Poe thought that Finn had it backwards, that Finn was the good man, not Poe.

The sound of ship fire and explosions greeted them as fast as the cold rush of snow and ice. Poe saw Rey shivering as they ran towards the Falcon.

As Finn looked up, he could see Resistance X-Wings taking shots at Star Destroyers, Tie Fighters, and Starkiller itself, but he felt a growing sense of dread. A X-Wing got clipped by fire from a Tie Fighter and went crashing to the surface. Finn cursed.

Han Solo froze in the snow, his expression set. "They're in trouble, we can't leave now," he told them. He gripped his blaster tightly.

Poe took a deep breath. "I'm open to suggestion. We can't leave this base in one piece. What do you suggest."

Han smirked. "My friend here's got a bag full of explosives, lets use them."

"We'll have trouble getting back in, any ideas on how to get around the security?" Finn asked.

Rey glanced between the men and straightened her shoulders. "Leave that to me."

"I'll cover you," Poe told her, sliding the jacket that Finn had given him off and putting it over her shoulders. Rey smiled up a him a little and slipped the jacket off. Poe could see the faint smile in Finn's eyes at the action.

"I'll go with Han and Chewie," he told them. "Cover them and see if I can't get any information the Resistance can use."

"Be-Be careful, Finn," Poe found himself saying. He felt Rey shift beside him.

Finn reached a hand out, clapping both Rey and Poe on the shoulders. "You two be careful too. We'll see you at the Falcon." He squeezed their shoulders then followed Han and Chewie with one last look over his shoulder at Poe.

Rey nodded and gestured for Poe to follow her. With a final look over his shoulder at Finn, Poe followed. He had a very bad feeling about all of this.


	7. Starkiller, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our intrepid heroes return to the bowels of Starkiller to help destroy the base and encounter some unfriendly company.
> 
> Author's Note: You're going to want tissues. Sorry for the delay, this was a difficult chapter for me to write.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts

Poe slipped his jacket over Rey's shoulders as he and Rey hurried towards the control station to buy Finn, Han, and Chewie access deeper into Star Killer base so that they could set charges inside the base. He glanced over his shoulder at the X-Wings and Tie Fighters in the sky, knowing that for but a twist of fate and Finn's presence on the Finalizer days before, he could have been in one of those Ties.

It was amazing the difference that just a few days made.

His fingers curled around the blaster pistol as he covered Rey, listening to her mutter under her breath as she examined the inner workings of the panel she'd just removed the cover for and then chose a part and pulled it out. They heard the hiss and crackle of energy as the doors deeper into the base hissed open for their friends.

Poe grinned at Rey and saw his friend's answering grin. It occurred to him, not for the first time over the past few days, that he wanted to be the man that the young woman and Finn thought he was. He'd defied the First Order and escaped with Finn, then he'd been determined to return BB-8 to the Resistance base.

Now he was on Starkiller, where it all seemed to begin and end, helping in the destruction of the superweapon.

If he made it out of all of this alive, he would have to make the most of this second chance, to do what was right.

He and Rey glanced up towards the still vanishing sun as Starkiller drained its energy and exchanged a look. "They may still need help," Poe ventured. "They may," Rey agreed. She hurried towards the ladder outside the substation they'd hit and began climbing. With a last glance at the dying sun, and a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, Poe hurried up the ladder after her. They climbed quickly, finding entrance easily into the base after Rey's earlier actions, and ran inside, Rey almost absently handing Poe back his jacket in the climate controlled interior of the base. Poe couldn't help but contrast the cold outside and the black and steel of the interior of the Starkiller base with the worn metal and riotous green of D'Qar. He knew now where he preferred to be. He paused just a few inches short of Rey, staring down into the bowels of the base. He could see Chewbacca and Finn moving along an upper level of the base, carefully planting charges. Then he saw movement on a lower level. His eyes drawn downwards, he saw the reflection of light on white helmets, and a darker shadow moving...Kylo Ren. He felt his heart beating faster as he regarded that masked figure. Ren was searching for someone. Then Poe saw Han Solo duck out of a back hall.

~~

Finn followed Han and Chewie into Starkiller base, grinning as the doors slid open, allowing them deeper into the base.

“The girl knows her stuff,” Han remarked as he passed a bag of charges to Finn.

“She does,” Finn agreed. On the journey here in the Falcon, Poe had nothing but praise for Rey, and Finn found that he wanted to meet the girl and talk to her. She seemed the type of person who would make a good friend.

None of them were surprised to find Stormtroopers in their path, but all three were deadly shots, and the troopers were easily taken care of. They had an edge of surprise on their side, and Finn intended to make the most of it.

“Finn, you and Chewie take the top level,” Han instructed them. He caught Finn on the shoulder for a moment and squeezed it. “I know Lando's hands are tied, but I think he'd be proud of you, Finn.”

That was high praise, coming from a man that Finn had looked up to his entire life.

“Thanks,” he murmured. “Good luck.”

He moved up the ladder after Chewie, moving to the top level so that they could set the charges. His eyes darted around now and then as he began setting charges on posts and walls. His eyes skimmed across the distance to the other side of the great chamber they were in, watching Chewie set charges on the other side. Finn could see Han further down, setting charges along the lower level.

Finn took a deep breath and continued along the narrow walkway, watching Chewie across the way out of the corner of his eyes. Once he was done placing the charges, he pulled the blaster rifle free that he'd slung over his shoulder, covering Han on the lower level as the older man moved carefully from target to target. Something caught Finn's eye and he ducked down behind a pillar, watching carefully. The hiss of a door opening was audible in the echoing chamber, and Kylo Ren appeared, searching for someone, them perhaps. Finn froze a moment, back pressed against the pillar, listening carefully.

"Find him," he heard Kylo Ren order.

The only one down there was Han. Kriff. Finn began sneaking carefully along the upper level, watching Kylo Ren warily.

Then he saw Han reveal himself, confronting Kylo Ren on a platform.

Finn strained to hear what they were saying, and a shock ran through Finn as Kylo Ren removed his mask. He knew that face, had known it as a child from visits Han and Leia had made to Cloud City...Ben Solo. Ben Solo was Kylo Ren? Finn felt so many conflicting emotions at that reveal. He recalled Leia Organa's expression when he'd described his captivity at Kylo Ren's hands. The guilt he'd seen in her expression made so much more sense now. He felt a sense of betrayal, and a strange understanding of why Leia might not have said anything. In his whirl of thoughts, he missed whatever exchange occured between Han and Ren.

He saw them only inches apart, and for a moment it looked as if Ren would embrace Han..could the monster that had invaded Finn's thoughts really be redeemed?

Then Ren's red lightsaber stabbed through Han Solo, one of Finn's oldest mentors and friends. He heard himself scream in horror, in anger, and the sound of his scream echoed and joined the sound of Rey's cry of pain, and Chewie's keening roar. The three sounds mingled together, creating a wave of grief and anger that echoed through the chamber. Finn felt his feet carrying him towards a ladder and down, hefting his blaster rifle as he hit the next tier and began shooting at Stormtroopers, his footsteps carrying him towards his dead mentor.

~~

Poe felt tears slipping down his cheeks, an unfamiliar sensation for most of his life, and he could hear the pain in Rey and Finn's voices, the torment in Chewbacca's roar, as they cried out at the death of Han Solo.

But their cries had drawn the attention of the Storm troopers. He dodged a blast and lifted his blaster and began firing back, his glare burning towards Kylo Ren. Ren's own dark eyes flickered up to him and Rey, though Poe felt fairly certain that it was Rey Ren was watching. The two of them fired at the storm troopers who were moving along the levels and up towards them. Poe could see two other figures, Chewbacca and Finn, moving along another level, firing at the troopers as well. Finn was headed in the direction of Ren, where Solo had fallen. Ren growled and started towards a ladder. Then, fire exploded throughout the chamber.

Chewbacca had detonated the charges. With a look at Rey, Poe and Rey ran back towards the door, away from the flames, and into the snowy expanse of Starkiller.  Poe could only remember a hand full of times in his life that he'd been outside

Poe could only remember a hand full of times in his life that he'd been outside on a First Order facility, during survival training, including training on Starkiller's surface. He led Rey towards the woods, hoping they could lose Ren and make it to the Falcon. They glanced back now and then towards the now smoldering remains of the facility. "The Falcon's this way," he told Rey as they fled, though he thought back to Finn and Chewbacca, hoping they'd made it out. They could wait at the ship for their friends an- Kylo Ren appeared out of the swirling snow and dead trees. 

"We're not done yet." 

"You're a monster," Rey swore at Ren. She exchanged a glance with Poe, and he felt the same anger he saw in her eyes kindling in his heart. Ren beat on his body, and Poe saw drops of blood fall in the snow. 

"It's just us now," Ren taunted. "Han Solo can't save you." Rey glared and brought her blaster up to shoot. Ren tore the weapon from her hands with some invisible force, the Force, Poe realized, and then flung her back towards the trees. She hit the upper trunk of a tree with a sickening thud and fell to the ground. 

Poe felt a mixture of anger, fear, and worry whirling in his blood as he ran to Rey's side, crying out her name. "Rey, no!" He hit the snow beside her and pulled her to him. Rey was still breathing, but

"TRAITOR!" Ren's voice tore through the air. 

Poe's head snapped up, that word ringing in his ears. Slowly, deliberately, he stood and faced Ren, bringing the weapon Maz had given him up and activated it. The blue of the lightsaber he held illuminated his face, his brown eyes burning with suppressed anger.

"That lightsaber," Ren snarled, pointing with his sickening, red blade, "It belongs to me." 

"Come get it," Poe

The next several moments passed in a blur, red hitting blue, sparks flying from both weapons, Finn dodging strikes aimed at his limbs, his shoulders, blocking Ren's blows when he could. It was clear Ren had years of training with the weapon, but Poe's determination was strong. Ren forced him back, the red saber slicing through branches, and Poe stumbled on a hidden hole, falling backward to the ground. Ren turned away just for a moment and Poe forced himself up, flinging himself back towards Ren. Ren swirled around, their blades clashing, and forced Poe backwards, the former tie pilot blocking strike after strike with his blue saber. He felt the trunk of a large tree hit his back, and held his blade up to ward off Ren. Ren pressed forward, trying to use strength to force Poe's blade down. 

Poe held his ground, holding off Ren's blade with all his strength, until Ren twisted the side of his blade, and one of the glowing shards of Ren's crossguard bit into Poe's shoulder. Pain sparked through him, the energy burning through the jacket Finn had given him and into his flesh. He tried to bite back the cry of pain but couldn't. He pushed forward in a pained frenzy, swiping at Ren with the blue lightsaber. The blow glanced off Ren's red saber and Poe blocked the darksider's blade. They traded blows, Poe catching Ren's shoulder with the blue blade, then Ren snarled, and managed to knock Poe's lightsaber away from him, where it landed several meters away in the snow. Poe dodged one blow, but the second caught him along the back, an even deeper pain slicing through him as he felt it burn along his spine and he fell forward. 

Then all he knew was darkness. 

~~

Finn had barely reached Han's body, which somehow had been caught on another, lower platform when he heard the charges going off around them. He struggled, lifting the body of his fallen mentor and half dragging him towards a ramp he saw leading towards another exit. He wasn't sure he would make it in time when he heard a familiar roar. Finn looked up to see Chewie standing close by. The

"We must leave," he told Finn in Shyriiwook. He then lead Finn up the ramp and they hurried, just missing a burning beam that collasped behind them, and made it out into the snow. Finn glanced back once over his shoulder as they reached the outside. "Where are Rey and Poe?" he demanded. "Ren is chasing them," Chewie growled. "

"Where are Rey and Poe?" he demanded. "Ren is chasing them," Chewie growled. "

"Ren is chasing them," Chewie growled.

"Ben you mean?" Finn asked, bitterness in his voice. "Kylo Ren," the

"Kylo Ren," the wookie replied, reminding Finn that Ben Solo had betrayed them all.

"Lets go get the Falcon and find them," Finn said firmly. Chewie growled his agreement, and the two of them hurried towards the Falcon, Chewie cradling Han. When they reached the Falcon, Chewie placed Han reverantly on an empty bunk then they hurried towards the cockpit, powering up the ship and letting the Falcon rise from the snow, hurrying in the direction Chewie said Rey and Poe had gone. The planet was beginning to crumble as they took off, and Finn had to trust Chewie's sense of direction. He was glad he did when the lights of the Falcon revealed Rey, leaning over Poe, in the snowy forest. Chewie quickly landed the ship and Finn and Chewie rushed out to help Rey board. When Finn saw Poe's

He was glad he did when the lights of the Falcon revealed Rey, leaning over Poe, in the snowy forest. Chewie quickly landed the ship and Finn and Chewie rushed out to help Rey board. When Finn saw Poe's injuried and unconscious state, he felt his heart drop. Poe looked dead, honestly, as dead as Han Solo was, and he could detect only the faintest of pulses.

As Rey and Chewbacca piloted the Falcon off of the crumbling Starkiller, Finn sat in the hold, the dead body of his mentor on one side, and the dying body of a man he thought he might already be in love with on his other.

 


	8. Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance regroups in the aftermath of Starkiller. The answer to a few mysteries are revealed, and everyone has to figure out how to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/Lucas Arts
> 
> Find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

Finn found himself pacing the hall outside of the medical wing after he'd been treated and debriefed, and told he would be informed when Poe was out of surgery, but for now he would have to wait and try not to make a nuisance of himself.

The General had debriefed him herself, given the nature of the mission. He knew that Han Solo's remains lay in the morgue, awaiting the General's orders on final arrangements. The sorrow Finn had seen in Leia's eyes when he'd informed her of Han's death during his debrief, and worse, who had killed him, would haunt him the rest of his days. Even seeing that sorrow, he hadn't been able to feel himself from feeling a sense of betrayal after what Kylo Ren had done to him aboard the Finalizer.

"Why didn't you tell me, after I returned to base after Jakku?" he'd demanded, the closest he'd ever come to insubordination with the General.

"Because I have difficulty dealing with the reality of it myself," Leia had admitted. "It is easier to think that Ben Solo is dead." Her eyes had gotten a far off look. "With Han's death, perhaps he really is. I am sorry, Finn, for what he did to you. And I do not know how to go about beginning to heal those wounds."

"Promise me one thing," Finn demanded. "That Poe be given a place in the Resistance, if he wants it."

"After Starkiller, I think only the most closed hearted could deny him that," Leia replied.

Finn regarded the unspoken question in her eyes and sighed. "Only five people know what happened in that Chamber, General, know who killed Han Solo...and it isn't my place to tell anyone outside of them, or you. The damage that the knowledge could do, well.."

They both knew what had happened after word that Leia's father had been Darth Vader had come out. The General was too important to the Resistance. "But," Finn continued, "It may be awhile before I'm really okay with the knowledge, if I ever am."

Leia hadn't asked anymore more of him, after that. She'd moved on to debriefing Rey.

Finn heard footsteps as he glanced away from the doors to the medical wing, again, and saw Rey there. She glanced towards the doors, then at Finn, her eyes sad.

"Any word?" she asked softly.

"They said they'd tell me when Poe was out of surgery," Finn replied. He checked the hall chrono. "That was seven hours ago."

"He has to pull through," Rey said fiercely. "He must."

Finn found himself reaching out and offering Rey a hand. Slowly, she took it, then surprised Finn by hugging him. In the hours he'd known her, she didn't strike him as someone who hugged often. "He will," Finn reassured her. "This is Poe we're talking about. He survived a lifetime of conditioning and broke it to free me, then survived Jakku. He has to survive this."

"I thought he was dead, when he first hit the ground," Rey said in a low tone.  "He came back for me, like my family never did."

Finn felt his heart turn over a bit as he regarded Rey.  "Well, it may not seem like much," particularly with Han gone, he thought, "But you can find a family here.  Poe, me, Force, the General...You're not alone anymore."

Rey studied Finn with inscrutable brown eyes for a long moment.  "I'll think about it," she said at last.  Her eyes narrowed a fraction. "But if you hurt Poe, I hurt you."

What was this, the shovel talk? Finn thought.  "The last thing I want to do is hurt Poe," he promised.

Rey eyed him a moment longer then nodded.  "Good.  Then perhaps we can be friends as well."

Finn opened his mouth to answer when BB-8 rolled into the hall and warbled at them.

~~R2 is awake~~ the orange and white droid informed them.  ~~General-Leia wants you in the Command Center~~

Finn exchanged a look with Rey and then hurried after BB-8.

In the Command Center, they were met by General Organa, a hopeful light in her eyes as she gazed at the now awake R2-D2.  C-3PO was blathering on about how happy he was to see R2 awake.

~~Friend-Finn, the drive~~ BB-8 advised Finn as R2 projected a map onto the screen in the room. 

Feeling a growing hope of his own, Finn knelt down and got the drive he'd risked his life for on Jakku and inserted it.  Moments later, the missing piece of the map glowed before them all.

"What is it a map to?" Rey asked, her eyes wide.

"To Luke Skywalker," Leia informed them.  "He was searching for lost Jedi temples.  He must have found one."  Her eyes fell form the map to Finn, and then to Rey.  "We need someone to go and find Luke, and bring him back.  I think I know who I want to send."

~~

Finn stood outside Poe's room, watching Rey as she said her goodbyes to the unconscious man.  Her expression was bittersweet, one betraying both hope and worry.  She wanted to find Luke Skywalker, and Leia insisted Rey was best for the job, telling the girl she was Force sensitive, and she had the best sway to bring Luke back, to train Rey in the ways of the Jedi.

Finn was mildly Force Sensitive, the General had once informed him, back when he'd first joined the Resistance, but not enough to block the likes of Kylo Ren from his mind.

That was one thing he'd asked Rey about, after it was decided that she would go and find Luke, to ask Luke if he knew a way to shield your mind from a Darksider.

Rey promised she would ask.

After several minutes, she sighed and picked up her staff, heading for the door of Poe's room.  She opened the door and gazed at Finn, smiling slightly at him.

"You'll take care of him?" she asked.

"I promised I would," Finn reiterated.

Rey nodded firmly.  "Make sure you take care of yourself too."  Hesitantly, as if she still wasn't sure about touching others, she placed a hand on Finn's shoulder.  As hesitantly, Finn pulled her into a hug.  He'd always wanted a little sister, maybe he had one now, after a fashion.

"Be careful," he told her.

Then she was gone, and Finn wandered into Poe's room alone.  He took a seat in the metal chair beside the bed and pulled out a data pad.

"So they say they're not sure if you can hear me or not, but I thought I'd read to you," Finn started as he qued up a book on the pad.  "It can't hurt, right?"

Finn had other duties on base he couldn't neglect, but he visited Poe every day, and sometimes for hours when he could, and read to the older man.  He didn't know if Poe could hear him, but he hoped he could.  He read stories about the Rebellion, about the heroes of his childhood: Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Leia Organa, Shara Bey, Kes Dameron, and others.  If Poe could hear him, perhaps he would hear what made Finn fight so hard for the Resistance.

Poe had already shown he wasn't a mindless drone, he had a heart, and a quick mind.  It made Finn wonder about other First Order troops, about their pilots and their Storm troopers.  Meeting Poe sort of humanized the individual soldiers for him, and he wasn't sure if that was a good thing, or a bad one.

BB-8 had taken to keeping Poe company in the infirmary, unless he was working with Finn on something.  The astromech droid advised Finn he was very worried about Friend-Poe, and wanted to keep watch over him.  Since he could help keep a read on Poe's vitals, the medical droids hadn't bothered forcing BB-8 to leave the room.

On the fourth day since Rey had left, Finn sat in the chair beside Poe's bed (a slightly more comfortable one he'd dragged from his own quarters, actually), reading a story about Shara Bey when he overheard Dr. Kalonia and who he thought might be General Organa talking in the hall outside.   He turned his head towards them when he realized they were talking about Poe.

"All of the results point to it, General," Dr. Kalonia advised Leia in a tone torn between amazement and concern.  "Standard procedure is to run DNA to check for any potential hereditary conditions when a patient is undergoing such intensive treatment.  The fact that his DNA came back as a match to a Resistance personnel member is unexpected to say the least."

Finn found himself on his feet, almost dropping the data pad and hurrying towards the door.

"What do you mean?" he blurted out, blinking and flushing a bit when both women looked at him.

General Organa's expression softened a moment.  "We've always wondered where the First Order gets such a supply of troops," she told Finn.  "And your friend Poe may have provided us with the answer."

Finn stared blankly at her.

"Finn, do you recall stories of children being kidnapped, while you were growing up?" Dr. Kalonia asked him.  "The Missing, they called them?"

Finn nodded slowly, glancing once back over his shoulder at Poe as a sickening realization hit him.  "Poe was kidnapped as a child?"

Leia Organa nodded, her expression weary.  "We can confirm it, through Poe's identity.  His DNA matches that of one Colonel Kes Dameron."

"Wait, he's who's son?" Finn asked, working to keep his jaw from literally dropping.

Finn knew Colonel Dameron.  He'd been one of the first to join the Resistance when Leia Organa had formed the organization.  Kes Dameron's son had been kidnapped from Yavin 4 as a child and his wife killed while searching for their child years later.  Dameron had always suspected the First Order and had thrown himself into the Resistance when the chance came.  While Dameron was a rather bitter man, given his experiences, he gave his all into training new Pathfinders in the Resistance.  Finn had heard a great deal of praise for the man as a trainer and officer.

"Poe, formerly a Tie Pilot in the First Order, is Colonel Kes Dameron's son," Dr. Kalonia replied firmly.

Finn's gaze whirled to Leia.  "We have to tell him!"

"And we will," Leia assured him.  

"I," Finn straighten.  "May I tell him, General?" he asked in a formal tone.

Leia Organa gazed at Finn very seriously and replied.  "Come with me, Lieutenant Calrissian.  We shall inform Colonel Dameron of the news."

Finn glanced over his shoulder at Poe as the General started down the hall.  "You'd need to get better soon, Poe, there's someone who will really want to meet you," he said before he followed after Leia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up, Reunion!!
> 
> The idea of pining at your loved one's bedside is idealistic, but I think, more realistically, while Finn would have a fair amount of time to spend by Poe's bedside, he would still have briefings, meetings, and other work that would be required of him on base.


	9. Reunions 2.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kes Dameron learns his son is alive, Finn deals with work, and Poe finally wakes up
> 
> IE the reunion everyone, including me, has been waiting for ;)
> 
> (Thanks to all my readers, kudoers, and commenters!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/Lucas Arts
> 
> find me on tumblr nytemere.tumblr.com

Kes Dameron's first reaction to learning his missing child was alive and on the Resistance base was one of cynical disbelief. His gaze at the General told Finn Colonel Dameron thought the General had lost her mind.

“That ship flew 26 years ago, General Organa,” Dameron growled softly. “I've got recruits to train.”

Finn noted that Leia had always shrugged off a certain amount of insubordination from Kes, at least this kind. He chewed on his lower lip as he took in the scene of a gruff old man with iron gray hair and a permanent scowl glaring at a surprisingly serene petite woman who no one on base could really say no to.

“Colonel, Sir, it's true,” Finn found himself stepping forward a second before he realized what he was doing.

Kes's stern glare swung towards him. “What was that, Lieutenant ?”

Finn shifted his stance to parade rest and met Kes Dameron's brown eyes with his own steady gaze. “Right now, there is an individual named Poe in the infirmary, recovery from wounds inflicted by Kylo Ren. Poe was a Tie Pilot, once, with the First Order, but he saved me when I was held captive on a Star Destroyer, escaped with me, and defected from the First Order. Poe found BB-8 and the Force Sensitive woman named Rey on Jakku, escaped the First Order again with them, met Han Solo, and came back to the Resistance with BB-8 to complete my mission, all while he thought I had died in the sands of Jakku. He's a brave man, and a hero. And according to the genetics tests run by Dr. Kalonia, he is your son.”

Kes folded his arms, still scowling at Finn. “Poe, you say?” 

Finn wondered at the unidentified emotion he saw glimmering in Kes's eyes. “That is his name now. His original designation given by the Order was PO-7032. He said it was the only name he'd ever known.”

Kes's expression turned pain. “What are the odds?”

“Sir?” Finn frowned.

“Shara and I named our little boy Poe,” Kes told Finn and Leia. “Poe Dameron.”

Finn exchanged a glance with Leia and she smiled faintly. “Sometimes the Force tells us things even when we don't believe them.”

Kes opened his mouth to tell her the Force could shove it, but stopped. A shuttering breath wracked the man before he spoke again. “I need to see these genetic tests. Then I want to see this Poe.”

~~  
Finn sighed and rubbed at his temples as he exited his most recent meeting and headed towards the infirmary. He'd just spent the past several hours listening to Intelligence discuss signs of First Order activity since the destruction of Starkiller. As of right now, there wasn't a lot, but rather than making them feel more at ease, it made people jumpy. Leia could still sense the presence of Kylo Ren, which meant the man hadn't died on Starkiller. From what intel Poe had given them before Starkiller, they knew it was just one base. Where were the other First Order forces?

General Ruran Kar, the Togruta in charge of Resistance Intelligence, wanted the chance to talk to Poe as soon as medical cleared him. There had been some grumbling from a few on why the First Order defector wasn't under guard, even while in the Infirmary, but Finn's fierce defense of Poe, Rey's own input before she left, and even Snap's grudging acceptance of the man's knowledge and his help at Starkiller that helped star to smooth things over.

Finn had found the story of Starkiller, and the story Rey had related to the Resistance pilots Jessica Pava and Snap Wexley had begun making its way around base. Most people were curious about Poe, amazed that he'd managed to defect from the First Order. There was more an underlying feeling of caution verses distrust now, Finn thought. People were still wary, Poe had been with the First Order for years, but more people seemed willing to at least try and give him a chance now.

He sighed. Once Poe woke up (he had to wake up, it was just a matter of when, Finn told himself), Poe would still have a rough road ahead of him, but perhaps not as rough of one as he would have had before Starkiller.

He wasn't surprised to find Colonel Dameron sitting in one of the two chairs now stationed by Poe's bed. The room hummed softly with the sound of machinery as Finn took the empty seat beside Kes.

Since Kes had discovered that his son was still alive, he'd run through a gambit of emotion: anger, frustration, bitterness, hope, joy. Now all he wanted was for Poe to wake up, to see what kind of relationship he might be able to establish with a son he hadn't seen in 26 years. If Finn hadn't been Intelligence trained, he might not have picked up in the nervous energy surrounding Kes these days. The man was not one to neglect his duties and he continued training ground troops, but he spent almost all his free hours here in the infirmary. 

He was nervous about how Poe would react to the news. Would Poe be angry that his father had never found him before this? Would he be happy to meet the family who'd thought he was dead?

Finn and Kes had talked a number of times about those terrifying, exhilarating moments during Poe and Finn's escape, and their reunion on the tarmac. Finn knew, instinctively that Poe might be overwhelmed at first, but would be glad indeed to meet Kes Dameron.

“No change?” Finn asked softly as he took his seat.

Kes shook his head lightly, his eyes still on Poe. “It's been a few weeks..Doc says it could be a few weeks more. He's lucky to be alive.”

“I know.” Finn remembered those heart wrenching moments in the Falcon, hoping to Force that Poe wouldn't die on the flight back to D'Qar. Losing Han had been rough, but losing Poe?

“You love him, don't you?” Kes asked, surprising Finn.

Finn blinked, glanced at Poe, then back at Kes, and sighed. “I might?” he answered. “I was...smitten, from the moment he took his helmet off. All of our interactions have been under pressure. Once he wakes up, I hope, if he's willing, maybe we can establish a normal friendship, then maybe a relationship?”

Kes gave Finn a penetrating look, then nodded. “Well, I can't really give you the protective Papa talk since I haven't seen him in 26 years, but..”

“I know I care about him, Colonel, I don't want to hurt him in any way,” Finn replied.

Kes gave him a small smile. “When we're off duty, it's Kes, alright?”

~~

Poe felt like he was swimming through a fog. 

He knew, somehow, he wasn't on Starkiller anymore. He spent most of his time feeling like he was floating in darkness. He'd hear snatches of voices, some happy, some sad, and he could make out words, but he couldn't answer.

He knew Rey had visited a few times, but then she'd said something about having to leave. He hoped she was okay.

He knew Finn visited often and would spent a long time telling him stories or just talking to him. Finn's words gave Poe a hold on the world beyond the darkness, told him there were people out there, evidently among the Resistance, that cared that Poe had survived.

He knew Han was dead, he knew Rey and Finn and Chewbacca were safe, those had been the most important things to him.

Now he just had to figure out how to wake up.

Right now he was aware of another voice, one he'd heard several times over the past few...how long had it been? He'd heard Finn mention the name Kes Dameron several times.

It felt like it should mean something to him, but he wasn't sure.

That voice was talking now, with Finn. 

Poe felt like he was slogging through syrup, but finally, he managed to open eyes eyes, wincing at the bright light of the room and blurry vision...was his vision okay? He couldn't fly with bad vision.

Assuming the Resistance would ever let him fly.

But first..

“F-Finn?” Poe managed, his throat feeling parched as he forced the word out.

“Poe? Poe!” Finn's tone turned excited. Poe heard the other man calling for a Dr. Kalonia.

“It's alright Poe, you're safe,” Finn told him as medical staff rushed into the room, pushing Finn and the stranger back. The next several minutes, or hours, Poe wasn't sure, were a whirl as he was poked and prodded, given some sort of weird and sickly sweet tasting nutrient drink, and then finally, left alone again with Finn and the stranger.

“Poe?” Finn asked softly, once they were all gone.

Poe opened his eyes again, brown orbs meeting Finn's, and felt a wave of relief. “Finn? Where am I? Where's Rey?”

“Resistance Base, D'Qar. Rey wanted to stay but she had to go find Luke Skywalker,” Finn told him gently.

That explained why Rey had left. Luke Skywalker was a legend..he'd always heard the name reviled in the First Order, but Poe knew now the First Order had been wrong about a lot of things.

“Am I-” Poe wasn't quite sure how to ask.

“You're not a prisoner,” Finn reassured him swiftly, seeming to pick up easily on Poe's thoughts. “Though my commanding officer really wants to talk to you when you're feeling better, glean everything the Resistance can from you on the First Order.”

“I-of course,” Poe found himself agreeing quickly. He'd brought BB-8 back to base expecting to be imprisoned once Rey was free. Now it seemed they wanted him as a resource, it was a step up. Poe reached his hand out blindly, and felt Finn take it. Another wave of relief swept through Poe. Finn's grip was reassuring, comforting. 

Finn was the first person who'd ever looked at Poe as something other than a cog or a number in the First Order machine that Poe could really remember. Poe knew he felt something strong for Finn, though he wasn't ready to put a word to it yet. But he sensed from Finn that Finn intended to be there for him, however he could.

It felt good to have a friend, and maybe something more?

Then the stranger cleared his throat and Poe blinked, turning his eyes towards the man. If he didn't know any better, he'd swear he was looking at an older version of himself.

Finn nodded at an unspoken question as the iron gray haired man stepped forward.

“Poe..this, this is Kes Dameron. He's your father,” Finn said.

Poe felt his own eyes go wide..Father? He had a father, a family? The only time he'd ever asked as a child about his family, he'd been told by a superior that they'd been a threat to the First Order and eliminated.

It had been an utter and complete lie.

“My...father?” Poe asked. He blinked at Kes. Some part of him wanted to ask why Kes hadn't come for him, but he knew better than anyone the lengths the First Order went to to control their troops. Kes probably hadn't even known Poe was alive.

“Hello Poe,” Kes said softly, reaching out a questing hand.

Finn let Poe's hand go, and Poe found his hand enveloped by Kes's weathered one.

“My little boy,” Kes said in a voice that almost broke, and Poe saw tears coming down his face. “Your mother and I searched for you for so long, but everyone told us you were dead...your mother named you Poe, you know.”

Maybe the Force had willed it, Poe thought as he glanced at Finn's smiling face.

Poe squeezed Kes's hand. “Father..” he said softly, voice full of wonder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many happy tears, talks, and adjusting coming up, but the Damerons are finally reunited!


	10. A New Path

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe begins to find his place in the Resistance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

Finn stood against the wall, arms crossed over his chest in a casual position, belying his anxiousness as he watched the man he was fairly certain he was completely gone on take one step, and then another, towards the end of the bars.

Poe was shirtless, light sweat gleaming on his skin and the cybernetics implanted in his spine glittering in the bright light of the physical therapy room. He grunted softly when he reached the end of the bars and leaned on them, executing a careful turn, and repeated the process of walking the length of the bars.

Beside Finn, Kes Dameron let out the breath he'd been holding and his face broke into a smile unlike any Finn had ever seen on the older man's face.

"Excellent," Dr. Kalonia said, glancing up from her data pad after speaking quietly with the physiotherapist. "You'll need regular physical therapy sessions for the next several weeks, but we can safely release you from the medical wing," she informed Poe. Her eyes swung towards Finn and Kes a moment as she spoke. "We can speak with the quartermaster about room assignments. I prefer to put you in with a roommate. Even if they aren't there all the time, I believe the company would be good for you." She quirked a brow at Poe's newly found father and his friend as she spoke.

Kes snorted. "I've got a room to myself, but," he paused and his glance swung towards Finn, who for a moment felt as if he was in a pair of cross-hairs, but Kes's demeanor didn't seem threatening, "I believe the second bunk in your room is free, isn't it, Calrissian?"

A thousand thoughts ran through Finn's head. A part of him would love for Poe to share a room with him. The other part wondered just how cruel the Force could be.

Poe glanced at both men, his mouth curving into a faint smile as he considered Kalonia's words.

"I'd like that, if you're willing, Finn?" there was a hint of hesitation in Poe's voice. It let Finn know that Poe was comfortable expressing how he felt around Finn...their conversations over the past several weeks had included Poe's upbringing in the First Order (Finn still recalled the dent that Kes had left in a cabinet the first time he'd heard any of it). Even hiding behind a helmet, Poe had learned not to express too much of anything - affection, hesitation, anger, fear, all if it could be used against you.

And right now Finn would give Poe anything to make him happy, though he was vaguely surprised Kes hadn't asked Poe to room closer to him, but perhaps Kes felt Poe should have the chance to adjust to the Resistance outside of spending time with his father.

"Of course, Poe," Finn replied. He found himself pushing off the wall and walking to the end of the parallel bars, standing just feet from Poe. "Whatever you need, Poe," he added in a low tone.

Poe smiled, and Finn was reminded again that the four people in this room were perhaps the only ones Poe felt truly comfortable around just yet.

"Thanks, Finn," Poe replied. "Help me off these things?"

Finn held out an arm and Poe placed a hand on Finn's forearm, carefully stepping away from the bars. The therapist appeared with a hoverchair for Poe, and a promise that it would only be a few more weeks before Poe was walking more on his own, but he wasn't to overdo it today.

Poe flashed Finn another smile, this one a bit brighter, as he rolled towards the door.

For that smile, Finn knew he'd do anything.  
~~

Poe's first few weeks out of the medical ward were trying for himself, and members of the Resistance around him.

For someone who had expected to be terminated as a result of his injuries from Starkiller, the care the Resistance gave him still baffled Poe at times. That and the actual kindness a few members outside of Kes and Finn showed him meant he had to completely rearrange his expectations of his new world.

Strange as it sounded, the wary and cautious looks he got from several people made Poe feel more comfortable rather than less. It told him that people in the Resistance weren't foolish enough to just automatically accept him with wide open arms. It meant people were thinking about risk, and what his presence among them meant.

During the day, when he wasn't in therapy, he found himself spending most of his time being interviewed (it felt so different from the interrogation he'd expected) by Resistance Intelligence. General Kar was intrigued by whatever information Poe could provide. Most of the time covered Poe's day to day among the First Order, what kind of orders he usually got, and the daily workings of other parts of the Order Poe was aware of.

Today had been particularly difficult. They'd asked questions about Poe's training, from the time he was abducted by the Order until he'd gotten his first assignment. He'd managed to suppress a number of memories that came reeling back during questioning. The First Order was hard on its child soldiers, and he recalled in particular the times he'd hidden injury, or helped others in his squad hide injury, to avoid termination.

He remembered the time they'd been lined up and forced to witness the execution of an older Stormtrooper trainee, probably 15 or 16, for trying to break out of formation while planetside. The sight of blood on the shiny black floor of the flightdeck would never leave Poe's mind.

He suppressed a shutter, his hands gripping the side of the chair he sat in.

He sat outside now, blindly staring up towards the pale blue sky as he tried to shake the feeling of cold that had settled over him during the interview that day. It felt bone deep, like he'd never get it out of his system.

"Hey, Dameron?"

The voice slowly drew him back to the present. It still felt weird to hear someone refer to him as anything other than PO-7032, or Poe. He was adjusting to actually having a last name. He turned to look over his shoulder and was surprised to see Temmin "Snap" Wexley regarding him. He had only see the X-Wing pilot in passing since he'd awoken from Starkiller.

"Sir?" Poe found himself using the honorific automatically, and Snap snorted.

"You aren't Resistance Military, at least not yet," Snap told him, walking up to stand beside Poe. The stocky pilot regarded him for a long moment before he took a seat on a convenient rock beside Poe.

"Yeah...not sure what I am right now," Poe admitted slowly as he met Snap's gaze, wondering if the other man was just here on chance, or if he had a purpose.

Snap's lips twisted into a faint smile as if he could guess Poe's thoughts. "Part of why I'm here," he said, gesturing around them. "By now everyone's heard that the former Tie Pilot wants to join the Resistance. Question is, in what capacity?"

"I don't know?" Poe asked, feeling a bit wary. He'd known flying all his life, but he didn't know that they'd trust him in an X-Wing, though he'd admired the ships from afar.

"General Kar gave me a file on you," Snap told him. "What information you gave them on Tie Pilot training, your record with the Order." His expression was impassive as he continued. "Seems an obvious place you might fit, though there are some who question if you should be allowed to. But the General's give absolute assurance that you aren't First Order mole and you're defection is an honest one." He smirked then. "The fact that you completed Calrissian's mission doesn't hurt either, when you could have just left."

"It might seem an obvious choice," Poe answered carefully. "But I'm not young enough or foolish enough to just assume I'd be welcome there."

Snap nodded. "I like you better for not making any assumptions." He sighed. "This isn't entirely easy for me...I've seen and lost a lot to the First Order, but everything I've seen and heard tells me you're a genuinely decent person. You've got pilot training, and we're in desperate need of new pilots after Starkiller."

Poe nodded, waiting to see what else the other man would say.

"So as Commander, I'm going to ask you if you're willing to take a turn in our flight simulators, when you're cleared fully by medical," Snap continued. "There are still going to be people who will protest the thought of you joining one of our X-Wing squadrons, but after everything you've done, I think you deserve a chance."

During the entire exchange, each man met the other's gaze squarely, measuring each other.

Poe let out a breath, feeling a stab of hope. "I'd like the chance to try, if you'll let me," he replied honestly.

Snap nodded, looking satisfied. "Good. Medical says you'll be cleared in another two weeks. If we're not out, then I'll oversee the testing myself." He paused and offered Poe a hand.

Poe took it, feeling strangely light after such a momentous decision.

"Welcome to the Resistance, Poe Dameron," Snap told him. "Maybe a bit premature, but I've got a good feeling about you. Still got to deal with my own prejudice, but I think we might become friends someday."

"I hope so," Poe replied.

As Snap walked away, Poe found himself smiling again. It felt like a real welcome, his talk with Snap. Finn was going to be overjoyed. He could already imagine the smile on Finn's lips.

Poe chewed on his lower lip at that mental image. Finn was fairly enthusiastic when he wasn't on assignment, and more than once Poe had found himself wanting to kiss those lips.

There'd been...relationships, if you could call them that, in the First Order. With that many people around in close quarters, it was bound to happen, but actual attachment was highly discouraged.

Poe found he was becoming very attached to Finn, lately.

In the Resistance, he'd witnessed more than one couple, occasional triad, who were obviously attached to each other. Here, it seemed to be encouraged, and the mental health therapist Poe had been seeing had suggested that it gave the members of the Resistance something more to fight for than just an ideal.

It was something Poe had been thinking a lot about lately, something else to fight for. Did Finn feel the same way, though, he thought? He knew Finn was his friend, but would the younger man really look for more than just that from a former member of the First Order, and someone who had nearly a decade on him? Finn was two days gone on a mission and wouldn't be back for another few days.

It gave him a lot of time to think.

He was still lost in those thoughts when Kes came and found him to take him to the mess hall for dinner, and he felt no closer to an answer when he went to bed that night.


	11. Maybe We Should Just Talk?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Poe's finding his place in the Resistance, both Poe and Finn must work through their emotions. Why can't they just find it in them to just talk already?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

Finn stood in the observation room with General Organa, his hands clasped behind his back, his expression carefully blank, but he could feel an undercurrent of excitement from everyone in the room, even Commander Temmin Wexley.

Poe Dameron sat in the flight simulator in the training room, running through yet another flight training simulation. The skill on display, and that had been on display for the past several simulations that Poe had run through, were impressive enough that even Admiral Statura had been impressed.

Poe had managed to garner both Statura and Wexley's approval, no small feat, Finn thought. Since Poe had been fully released from medical six months ago, he'd been training with the X-Wing pilot's under Wexley's command. Finn felt Poe might have hit the cockpit of an X-Wing sooner, but both Poe and Snap had agreed that it was best to wait for Poe to get in the X-Wing once he had the majority of the Resistance behind him.

That one had rankled Finn just a bit. He knew Poe had broken his First Order conditioning; the General knew; Snap and his pilot's knew, Command knew...but there'd still been at thread of distrust from some quadrants. Finn knew there would always be those that mistrusted Poe, but they were now, thankfully, a minority.

As the General had predicted, it was Poe himself that won the Resistance over. Finn still marveled at how resilient Poe had been, and just how kind the other man really was. His kind nature and habit of just helping people on base went a long way towards making people trust him.

And Poe didn't shrink back from work that some people would think beneath them. Finn recalled once when he'd gotten out of debrief after a mission and found Poe up to his elbows in soapy water, helping the kitchen staff clean the mountains of dish and silverware the Resistance went through on a daily basis.

More surprising (or maybe not...Poe just had a presence about him), was how Snap and the other pilots had warmed to Poe. One of the long tables in the mess was now filled with an odd mix of pilots, ground, and intelligence troops, whoever happened to be on base at the time, at every meal, with Poe and Finn, or just Poe when Finn was out on a mission, somewhere at the center. All Resistance personnel mingled at meals, but Finn's friends and the friends that Poe had made among the pilots seemed to be making a point to purposely mix with each other and socialize now.

Poe had rather interesting gravitational pull to him. Though others would say it was the two of them combined, because Finn had his own presence that he usually ignored.

As Poe executed one last, perfect barrel roll and completed the simulation, Finn grinned, cheering quietly for his friend. Leia glanced over him and smirked while Snap looked particularly satisfied. Force, how Finn loved Poe.

Now how to tell him? Perhaps tonight...it had to be worth the risk, it just had to be.

"We'll take him up first for a test flight, then on a couple patrol runs, but I think he's ready, Admiral," Snap said, glancing towards Statura.

Statura smiled faintly, always the height of professionalism and command, and nodded. "I agree with your assessment, Commander Wexley. That's one reason I'm putting him in your Squadron."

Snap looked thoughtful, running his fingers lightly over his beard a moment and nodded. "I think he'll be a good fit."

Finn held back while Snap went to inform Poe of their decision, though he couldn't help but grin from ear to ear, and he was positively vibrating with energy. He glanced towards Kes Dameron, who sat near the back of the room, and noticed the tears gathered in the man's eyes, but Kes was smiling, looking fiercely proud.

"Just like his mother," Kes said in a voice that only Leia and Finn could really hear. "She'd be so kriffing proud."

"Yes," Leia agreed softly. "Shara Bey would be very proud of her son."

~~

Poe wasn't sure he ever wanted to come down off this emotional high. As he sat at dinner next to Finn that night, surrounded by pilots, Pathfinders, and Intelligence troops, he felt that he truly belonged here now.

The look in Kes Dameron's eyes when he'd hugged Poe, after the Admiral and Snap had finished speaking to him, a look of bittersweet joy, made Poe wish he had more than a six year old's memories of his mother. He and Kes had spent many hours over the past several months talking about Poe's childhood, Poe's mother, and in some ways everything Poe had missed when he'd been kidnapped.

There were moments when his anger at the First Order and all they'd stolen from him were almost too much. Then he'd remember what Rey told him once on a comm call, that you couldn't spend your life living in the past at the expense of your future.

He and Rey had both changed a great deal over the past several months. Living in the past was a luxury neither of them really had.

One thing that had struck Poe was the love he always heard in Kes Dameron's voice when he described Poe's mother. Shara Bey had been one of the greatest lights of Kes's life, and her loss had fundamentally changed him in some ways. That love he felt for his lost wife still shown through, almost two decades later. 

It made Poe wonder what it might be like, to feel that deeply for someone. Attachments were brutally discouraged in the First Order. He'd definitely formed attachments of friendship to people here in the Resistance though. He treasured each of those friendships, turning them over in his mind and compared it to what he'd never had in the order. Jess, Snap, Bastian, Iolo, Indre and Iferia from the Pathfinders, and Finn..

But Poe had to admit to himself, when he was alone, that the admiration and emotion he felt for Finn were more than just friendship. He physically longed for the other man when he was out on missions, and he knew Finn missed him; the man told him every time they reunited after one of Finn's missions with an embrace.

Some nights Poe would awake to Finn crying out in his sleep, and he'd end up sliding into the bunk beside the other man, wrapping arms around him as Finn pressed his face into Poe's neck, seeing physical comfort and contact.

Finn had done the same for him, willingly sliding into Poe's bunk, or pulling Poe into his, and just holding him.

It was getting harder and harder to pretend he wanted those embraces for more than just comfort and more than just as a friend.

From the looks he'd caught Finn giving him when he thought Poe wasn't looking, he was fairly certain Finn felt something for him, but he seemed hesitant to express it. Finn had told him once he didn't want Poe to feel as if Finn was the only person who Poe could rely on among the Resistance. 

Poe held back as well, afraid that he might be a burden on Finn, and in part simply because he feared risking the friendship he had with Finn. But tonight, some of the advise Rey, Kes, and Leia had given him played over and over in his head.

Rey had told him their lives had both changed drastically from sudden decisions - his to defect, hers to save BB-8, and sometimes you just had to take a chance. Leia had repeated that sentiment, telling him sometimes you just had to seize the moment. Kes had told him to savor every moment he had with loved ones, no matter how long or short.

The pilots held an impromptu party that night to welcome Poe into their squadron, though neither Finn or Poe drank much, both feeling too keyed up by their own thoughts.

They glanced at each other over the course of the evening, gazes of hope, worry, celebration. When Finn finally suggest they head to bed, Poe, didn't argue.

The walk back to their quarters was quiet, both men lost in their own thoughts.

As Finn shut the door behind them, Poe took a deep breath, turning to face his best friend. "So Finn, I.." he trailed off, manging a smile.

Finn swallowed, feeling the nervousness that had been with him all evening rising. "Poe...I.." he took a deep breath, both men falling silent, brown eyes meeting brown. "I think I may l-

He broke off again.

"Can I kiss you, Finn?" Poe asked, realizing both of them were going to keep stumbling over their words until one of them got it out.

The look of relief, of joy, that spread over Finn's face was all Poe needed. "Force I wish you would," Finn replied.

They met in the middle of the room, Finn's arms going around Poe's waist, Poe's around Finn's neck, and they both leaned forwad, their lips meeting slowly, softly.

They both pulled back slightly after a few moments, both thinking the other was wearing a somewhat goofy smile. Then Finn tilted his head a bit, and Poe met his lips again. They kissed, slowly backing towards the closest bunk, falling back onto it, body to body, falling into each other.


	12. What the Future May Bring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe and Finn look towards the future.
> 
> A happy wrapup to The Tie Pilot and the Resistance Officer. Thank you to everyone who read, commented, and kudoed, I wouldn't have gotten beyond chapter 1 without y'all! I had so much fun with this particular AU and I hope you did as well. There may be future oneshots, but the original story of how Poe and Finn met and got together has come to a close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Wars belongs to Disney/LucasArts
> 
> find me on tumblr: nytemere.tumblr.com

“Lieutenant?”

Finn glanced up from the stack of data pads he'd been review of recent intel, “Yes, Private?” he asked, recognizing the dark haired woman from a recent batch of new recruits. 

She gave him a bright, earnest smile, and Finn thought she couldn't be more than 18. Sometimes he felt decades older around the newest recruits.

“I am to report that Black Squadron is returning to base.”

General Kar snorted on the other side of the room and waved at Finn. “Go on, Lieutenant Calrissan. I know you'll want to meet with Lieutenant Dameron.”

Finn saluted smartly and followed the Private from the room.

Once in the hall, Finn jogged through the base and towards the hanger, grinning to himself. Black Squadron had been gone for the past several days on a routine patrol, and for once nothing had gone south.

Finn rather preferred the missions that Poe ran with his squadron, but Poe had taken some solo missions, specifically recognizance and a couple of undercover. Two had left Poe recovering for some days in the medical wing, but Finn knew he couldn't ask Poe not to take the missions.

They were living in a time of war against the First Order, and Poe more than anyone had reason to want to see the Order topple. Danger was a frequent fact in their lives.

It just made Finn appreciate the home comings and reunions all that more.

The X-Wings were taxiing into the hanger by the time Finn reached it, and he was thankful to see the familiar for of Poe's Black One (there'd been a few grumbles about the color, since Poe used to fly black Tie fighters, but Snap had overridden the objections).

He hung back a safe distance, waiting for his boyfriend's X-Wing to settle and for Poe to climb out of the cockpit.

BB-8 was unloaded from the X-Wing by the time Poe hit the ground, and came whirling up to Finn, beeping cheerfully. While BB and Finn had worked well together for years, BB-8 was still an astromech, and Poe did a lot more flying than Finn did. While Finn did miss the droid on some missions, he felt better knowing his old friend was there to help keep an eye on Poe.

As Poe scanned the hanger, his face lit up at seeing Finn, and a much easier smile than when Poe had first joined the Resistance flickered over the man's face as Finn jogged over to him.

“Glad you have you back, Poe,” Finn said as he pulled Poe into his embrace.

“Glad to be back, Finn,” Poe replied. He let himself bury his face in the crook of Finn's neck, soaking in the comfort and presence of his boyfriend before he tilted his head to kiss Finn.

And of course Finn couldn't resist that look in Poe's brown eyes as he pressed his lips against Poe's.

“Alright boys, enough goopiness,” Snap said good naturally. “Poe, we've got a debrief, then you and your boyfriend can go canoodle.”

Poe pulled back reluctantly and squeezed Finn's hand. “Meet me in our quarters?” the pilot asked.

“Of course,” Finn agreed.

An hour later, Poe slipped into their room, smiling to find Finn already there, hot cup of caf waiting for him.

“How was the patrol?” Finn asked as he handed the mug to Poe in exchange for another kiss.

“Old traces of the Order, nothing recent,” Poe reported, rolling his shoulders. Spending hours if not days in an X-Wing always left him feeling a bit stiff. “Rapier Squadron goes out tomorrow. Black Squadron's X-Wings need some maintenance before they send us back out again.”

Finn nodded, knowing that each X-Wing would be inspected from top to bottom to keep them in as best shape as possible.

“So you've got a few days?” Finn asked casually.

“Yeah, you?” Poe looked at him hopefully as he sipped the hot caf. After he'd finished half the mug he set it down and began pulling off his boots, then his flight suit.

“Probably another week before they send me out,” Finn reported.

“Mm, a week of nights together?” Poe asked. “I like the sound of that.”

“I've missed you,” Finn said as he watched his boyfriend kick his flightsuit into a pile on the floor.

“Missed you too,” Poe replied. “It's different, here in the Resistance. There...well, there was nothing to look forward to when I returned, before the Resistance. Now,” he smiled warmly. “Now I know what I'm fighting for, flying for.”

Finn glanced idly towards the door and then at the chrono, thinking that dinner wouldn't be served for another two hours, and he had Poe alone in their rooms after being apart for a week.

“You know,” he said with a raised brow. “I could join you in the refresher, might be easier to wash your back, you know, stiff as you usually are after a mission.”

“When's Dad expecting us to meet him?” Poe inquired, making a show of slipping off the rest of his clothing.

“Not til dinner,” Finn replied, heat growing in his eyes as he watched Poe.

“Then yeah, I think you should join me in the refresher,” Poe agreed.

They were almost late to dinner with Kes, but the older Dameron smiled in faint amusement as Finn and Poe approached him in the mess. He pulled Poe into a quick hug, having been out with recruits in the field when his son had returned earlier. “Welcome home, son,” Kes told Poe as Finn and Poe settled across the table from him. He snorted. “Or at least as close to home as we'll get right now.”

Finn's expression turned thoughtful at that, as Kes began peppering Poe with general questions about how the pilot's mission had gone. Finn didn't say much over dinner, letting Poe and Kes carry on most of the conversation. Poe was poking at the remains of his dinner when he glanced at Finn, that thoughtful expression still on his boyfriend's face.

“Credit for your thoughts?” Poe asked.

“Hmm?” Finn tilted his head. “Thinking about home...someday the Order will be defeated, someday, hopefully, we'll all be there to see it. Thinking about where home would be then.”

“Your family is in Cloud City, aren't they?” Kes asked. 

Finn nodded. “I'll visit them, when it's safe, but not sure if I'd want to settle there.”

Kes glanced towards Poe. “There's always Yavin 4,” he said softly. “Family estate is in the care of one of Poe's aunts right now.”

Finn glanced towards Poe, watching his boyfriend's expression. 

Poe looked...curious. “Is...is Mom there?” Poe asked.

Kes's expression was both fond and pained. “She is.”

“And more family?” Poe asked, almost hesitantly.

“Your mama's kin, and mine,” Kes replied. “I haven't seen most of them in years but..well family is family, so long as you haven't done anything completely reprehensible.”

“Like fly a Tie Fighter for the First Order?”

“That wasn't your fault,” Kes replied in a fierce tone. “The family will be happy you're still alive, and you're free.”

“I might want to see Yavin,” Finn said casually, reaching out to take Poe's hand in his own.

“Maybe, after the war's over,” Poe said, interlacing his fingers with Finn's. Poe glanced up, meeting Finn's gaze, and his eyes were shining. “I know where home is, though, where it will always be.”

“Where?” Finn asked.

Poe smiled brightly. “As long as I'm with you, Finn, I'm home.”

**Author's Note:**

> In this AU, Poe Dameron was kidnapped by the First Order as a child on a raid on Yavin 4. Shara Bey died while searching for what happened to her son. Kes Dameron still lives, but is a hollow man after the loss of his wife and child. Finn is the second child of Lando Calrissian.


End file.
